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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 463184" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>It is time to stop the extra money. Child support covers all that is required to be given to her mother. Period. You already pay for the extras that the extra money is to fund. That extra money is play money for mom and stepdad, it is NOT going to difficult child. IF they want more, they can go to court. Then you can take school records, records of all you have paid in addition to the extra you were giving her to pay for stuff. Mom does not want cgfg out in the world at all. that has been clear for a long time. This is because something is going on at that house that hse is afraid cgfg will talk about. Don't know what it is, or if it is illegal or would just make her look bad, but that is why cgfg isn't allowed to do things.</p><p></p><p>DO NOT SPEAK TO THIS WOMAN. E V E R. At least not without someone who can be an unbiased witness to whatever goes on. If you must speak with her, take a police officer iwth you because you are unsure about how she will react and are afraid she may do something unpredictable or may take it out on cgfg. Seriously. </p><p></p><p>Get this whole mess back before the court -the judge or a mediator. She is taking you for a ride. I don't really care if she gets too much of husband's money, except that he sure uses that to not take care of stuff around the house and make you pay for things. </p><p></p><p>YOU are the only real parent cgfg has. I know you care for her. I also know your relationship wiht her dad isn't good - and she probably knows it and is scared that soon no one will give a hoot about her. So before your legal chance to help her ends, get this before a mediator and get some stuff fixed for her. Make the mediator give more time, stop the extra play money for mom (no problem if $$ goes to stuff for cgfg, but it just does not, so why pay it. Heck, put that amt in a bank account with YOUR name on it, not cgfgs, but set it aside for her activities. If you put cgfg's name on it, her mom and/or dad can go and get legal access to it. In time, what you don't use for activities can be used to fund college or a car or something. </p><p></p><p>When you cut off the extra $$, Gma will make it up to mommy. It is what she does. So let her. Tell mommy that since the extra is for activities, and you can't see that cgfg is in many, you are choosing to use it for something else. Do NOT tell her you are setting an acct up for cgfg. LEt her know that the extras are gone because she would not spend a measly twenty bucks for a few boxes of shells for an activity. You can't see where that extra is going to help cgfg, so you are not going to let it happen.</p><p></p><p>If she wants it, she can take husband to court and explain where taht extra has gone, and why she can buy all these things for herself but not clothe her child or use the extra activity money given to her for tutors that cgfg needs for success in school, for activities taht cgfg is doing, and why she won't let cgfg do things. There is a LOT that a court won't like, and any decent atty can get things amended to insist cgfg can do activities. Esp as mommy neglects her education the way she does - judges do NOT like that.</p><p></p><p>Don't pay for the shells. Either let gma do it, or let cgfg be a PITA to her mom until mom does it. Mom pulls this stuff because she can - she knows gma or you will pay for it. I would be sorely tempted to tell cgfg some of the things I did to be a PITA until I got what I wanted. Salt in the coffee can or in a bottle of soda is just a beginning. Jelly in shoes is also fun. Gee, how did that get there? I don't even like jelly. Dog poop on your floor mat? how did you track that in there?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 463184, member: 1233"] It is time to stop the extra money. Child support covers all that is required to be given to her mother. Period. You already pay for the extras that the extra money is to fund. That extra money is play money for mom and stepdad, it is NOT going to difficult child. IF they want more, they can go to court. Then you can take school records, records of all you have paid in addition to the extra you were giving her to pay for stuff. Mom does not want cgfg out in the world at all. that has been clear for a long time. This is because something is going on at that house that hse is afraid cgfg will talk about. Don't know what it is, or if it is illegal or would just make her look bad, but that is why cgfg isn't allowed to do things. DO NOT SPEAK TO THIS WOMAN. E V E R. At least not without someone who can be an unbiased witness to whatever goes on. If you must speak with her, take a police officer iwth you because you are unsure about how she will react and are afraid she may do something unpredictable or may take it out on cgfg. Seriously. Get this whole mess back before the court -the judge or a mediator. She is taking you for a ride. I don't really care if she gets too much of husband's money, except that he sure uses that to not take care of stuff around the house and make you pay for things. YOU are the only real parent cgfg has. I know you care for her. I also know your relationship wiht her dad isn't good - and she probably knows it and is scared that soon no one will give a hoot about her. So before your legal chance to help her ends, get this before a mediator and get some stuff fixed for her. Make the mediator give more time, stop the extra play money for mom (no problem if $$ goes to stuff for cgfg, but it just does not, so why pay it. Heck, put that amt in a bank account with YOUR name on it, not cgfgs, but set it aside for her activities. If you put cgfg's name on it, her mom and/or dad can go and get legal access to it. In time, what you don't use for activities can be used to fund college or a car or something. When you cut off the extra $$, Gma will make it up to mommy. It is what she does. So let her. Tell mommy that since the extra is for activities, and you can't see that cgfg is in many, you are choosing to use it for something else. Do NOT tell her you are setting an acct up for cgfg. LEt her know that the extras are gone because she would not spend a measly twenty bucks for a few boxes of shells for an activity. You can't see where that extra is going to help cgfg, so you are not going to let it happen. If she wants it, she can take husband to court and explain where taht extra has gone, and why she can buy all these things for herself but not clothe her child or use the extra activity money given to her for tutors that cgfg needs for success in school, for activities taht cgfg is doing, and why she won't let cgfg do things. There is a LOT that a court won't like, and any decent atty can get things amended to insist cgfg can do activities. Esp as mommy neglects her education the way she does - judges do NOT like that. Don't pay for the shells. Either let gma do it, or let cgfg be a PITA to her mom until mom does it. Mom pulls this stuff because she can - she knows gma or you will pay for it. I would be sorely tempted to tell cgfg some of the things I did to be a PITA until I got what I wanted. Salt in the coffee can or in a bottle of soda is just a beginning. Jelly in shoes is also fun. Gee, how did that get there? I don't even like jelly. Dog poop on your floor mat? how did you track that in there? [/QUOTE]
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