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<blockquote data-quote="Shari" data-source="post: 463188" data-attributes="member: 1848"><p>The extra was agreed to in their parenting agreement. If he doesn't pay it, he's not paying support...so I'm not sure that's really an option.</p><p></p><p>And I am pretty sure grandma has finally cut <em>some</em> strings. When bio divorced her first husband, they had this house financed, and she kept it, but could not get it refinanced on her own. Mommy and daddy bought it for her, and she's been paying them $100 a month on her "loan". The stipulation was, though, (this is what she told me way back then), if she ever got remarried, she had to refinance the house - they would no longer carry the loan. I think they finally made her follow through on that, and I think she has a "real" house payment now. They took out a mortgage on the house some time back, and we expected some new grand something to show up and it never did. Bio's mommy has also stopped taking cgfg to doctor appointments, leaving bio to do it. So I can't say for certain, but I do think grandma has gained a tad bit of cartilage in her back bone. A wee tad, but more than she had before.</p><p></p><p>However, I have no doubt if cgfg tells grandma mom won't pay for her shells that grandma will buy them. I can't imagine grandma not providing for cgfg. But for some reason, I think cgfg isn't SUPPOSED to tell grandma.</p><p></p><p>I am stressed about several things today, so its probably not a good day for me to make any decisions, but honestly, right now, I am thinking either pay it and demand more time with cgfg, or getting this in front of someone is our best options. </p><p></p><p>And I would <em>love</em> to give cgfg some ideas like that, but even if its justified, it is sooo wrong. I can't make myself.</p><p></p><p>Oh, and PS - bio's text to me about whether or not cgfg could be in this activity when I took her to sign up night - "She talked to me and I told her she could. I figure it would do her good, she could learn from someone other than us and maybe it will stick with her more."</p><p></p><p>I hate shades of gray, and I hate people who use children. No, kids don't have to be involved in all this extra stuff - they can grow up fine without it. But she did this sort of thing when bio and husband were together, she did it until bio married this guy, half her family continues to do these things, and there's no reason she can't or shouldn't be! (except that its not under mom's control now...) </p><p></p><p>And while I'm at it, I hate my ex and his girlfriend today, too. I pity the first one who crosses my path this weekend...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Shari, post: 463188, member: 1848"] The extra was agreed to in their parenting agreement. If he doesn't pay it, he's not paying support...so I'm not sure that's really an option. And I am pretty sure grandma has finally cut [I]some[/I] strings. When bio divorced her first husband, they had this house financed, and she kept it, but could not get it refinanced on her own. Mommy and daddy bought it for her, and she's been paying them $100 a month on her "loan". The stipulation was, though, (this is what she told me way back then), if she ever got remarried, she had to refinance the house - they would no longer carry the loan. I think they finally made her follow through on that, and I think she has a "real" house payment now. They took out a mortgage on the house some time back, and we expected some new grand something to show up and it never did. Bio's mommy has also stopped taking cgfg to doctor appointments, leaving bio to do it. So I can't say for certain, but I do think grandma has gained a tad bit of cartilage in her back bone. A wee tad, but more than she had before. However, I have no doubt if cgfg tells grandma mom won't pay for her shells that grandma will buy them. I can't imagine grandma not providing for cgfg. But for some reason, I think cgfg isn't SUPPOSED to tell grandma. I am stressed about several things today, so its probably not a good day for me to make any decisions, but honestly, right now, I am thinking either pay it and demand more time with cgfg, or getting this in front of someone is our best options. And I would [I]love[/I] to give cgfg some ideas like that, but even if its justified, it is sooo wrong. I can't make myself. Oh, and PS - bio's text to me about whether or not cgfg could be in this activity when I took her to sign up night - "She talked to me and I told her she could. I figure it would do her good, she could learn from someone other than us and maybe it will stick with her more." I hate shades of gray, and I hate people who use children. No, kids don't have to be involved in all this extra stuff - they can grow up fine without it. But she did this sort of thing when bio and husband were together, she did it until bio married this guy, half her family continues to do these things, and there's no reason she can't or shouldn't be! (except that its not under mom's control now...) And while I'm at it, I hate my ex and his girlfriend today, too. I pity the first one who crosses my path this weekend... [/QUOTE]
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