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The Watercooler
interesting day on multiple levels
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<blockquote data-quote="Jena" data-source="post: 230241" data-attributes="member: 4514"><p>steely hi i was thinking about you, i just responded on your thread. yea it was a busy day but as i sit here exhausted it was worth it. difficult child isn't sleeping, she faked me out. she's up again. this may go on all week, her sleepless due to this extreme change. i'm sure boyfriend's ridiculous cabinet slamming didn't help much ugh. i kill myself than he goes and ruins it like that.</p><p> </p><p>yet her and i got our quiet time talking, i soo looked forward to it tonight to hear about her day, how it was, how she felt, i missed her alot. more than i thought i would not being able to be here at hw time and all. see her little face walking out of school. ok let me stop lol.</p><p> </p><p>hmm yes i'm dodging the boyfriend marriage quetion. lol i'm afraid of marriage. there i said it. this is ok yet marriage is so final. i dont' know. i'm loyal to him and love him, doubt him in moments like tonight bigtime. maybe i shouldn't yet i can't help it. it's not a regular argument at least not to me, i wasn't arguing lol it was all him, his obvious insecurities. i knew just knew this would happen some form of insecurity on his part that i was going back to work. wasn't sure how it would manifest itself, thought maybe he'd be a big boy and talk about, use his words. instead he yells and slams cabinets.</p><p> </p><p>to me, me working, continuing to work on getting difficult child even somewhat, keeping up on easy child this was all the final piece the work thing. if i can make this happen i want to see what i can do, how i juggle how he behaves how i adapt to such juggling again with a difficult child. than my head will be clearer in regards to him.</p><p> </p><p>he made his mistaeks in the beginning i'm not sure if you remember, i moved past them. he changed alot and for the better. yet tonight was infantile, i dont' do infantile i truly dont' unless it's me lol. you have a problem you open your mouth and you say it. what's wrong with being excited about a job, wanting to talk about it, feeling excited again about something?? absolutely nothing. he's been pretty great for the most part up till now. his reaction to me working again has thrown me for a loop. marriage scares me steely bigtime. the finality of it all. i did it once it didnt' turn out too well. </p><p> </p><p>ok enough said lol</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Jena, post: 230241, member: 4514"] steely hi i was thinking about you, i just responded on your thread. yea it was a busy day but as i sit here exhausted it was worth it. difficult child isn't sleeping, she faked me out. she's up again. this may go on all week, her sleepless due to this extreme change. i'm sure boyfriend's ridiculous cabinet slamming didn't help much ugh. i kill myself than he goes and ruins it like that. yet her and i got our quiet time talking, i soo looked forward to it tonight to hear about her day, how it was, how she felt, i missed her alot. more than i thought i would not being able to be here at hw time and all. see her little face walking out of school. ok let me stop lol. hmm yes i'm dodging the boyfriend marriage quetion. lol i'm afraid of marriage. there i said it. this is ok yet marriage is so final. i dont' know. i'm loyal to him and love him, doubt him in moments like tonight bigtime. maybe i shouldn't yet i can't help it. it's not a regular argument at least not to me, i wasn't arguing lol it was all him, his obvious insecurities. i knew just knew this would happen some form of insecurity on his part that i was going back to work. wasn't sure how it would manifest itself, thought maybe he'd be a big boy and talk about, use his words. instead he yells and slams cabinets. to me, me working, continuing to work on getting difficult child even somewhat, keeping up on easy child this was all the final piece the work thing. if i can make this happen i want to see what i can do, how i juggle how he behaves how i adapt to such juggling again with a difficult child. than my head will be clearer in regards to him. he made his mistaeks in the beginning i'm not sure if you remember, i moved past them. he changed alot and for the better. yet tonight was infantile, i dont' do infantile i truly dont' unless it's me lol. you have a problem you open your mouth and you say it. what's wrong with being excited about a job, wanting to talk about it, feeling excited again about something?? absolutely nothing. he's been pretty great for the most part up till now. his reaction to me working again has thrown me for a loop. marriage scares me steely bigtime. the finality of it all. i did it once it didnt' turn out too well. ok enough said lol [/QUOTE]
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