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<blockquote data-quote="TerryJ2" data-source="post: 376048" data-attributes="member: 3419"><p><em>she demanded that we stop talking about the past (i.e. last Wednesday).</em> </p><p> </p><p>Boy, that sounds familiar. My difficult child is just starting to "get it" when we talk about patterns, which includes the past--Wednesday, yesterday, or 10 min ago.</p><p> </p><p>Allan-Mattem, I beg to differ, because consquences are real life. You can coach <em>and</em> have consequences. If I smash my car, I'm stuck dealing with-the insurance company and figuring out transportation while the repairs are made. How is that any different than teaching our children consquences, as long as they match the transgression? Consquences ARE coaching.</p><p>My son can create his own consquences now, and it saves us from being the bad guy. He is learning responsiblitiy.</p><p> </p><p>Kids who just undergo the punishment to get it overwith are not yet at the developmental stage to understand conscience, but it is a first step. The other will come with-time.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TerryJ2, post: 376048, member: 3419"] [I]she demanded that we stop talking about the past (i.e. last Wednesday).[/I] Boy, that sounds familiar. My difficult child is just starting to "get it" when we talk about patterns, which includes the past--Wednesday, yesterday, or 10 min ago. Allan-Mattem, I beg to differ, because consquences are real life. You can coach [I]and[/I] have consequences. If I smash my car, I'm stuck dealing with-the insurance company and figuring out transportation while the repairs are made. How is that any different than teaching our children consquences, as long as they match the transgression? Consquences ARE coaching. My son can create his own consquences now, and it saves us from being the bad guy. He is learning responsiblitiy. Kids who just undergo the punishment to get it overwith are not yet at the developmental stage to understand conscience, but it is a first step. The other will come with-time. [/QUOTE]
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