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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 101704" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>Hi and welcome. Sounds like you already know a lot of what is going on in your kids' lives and that's a huge step forward.</p><p></p><p>Having a Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) kid is something on this side of pure misery. It takes a lot of therapy, a lot of interventions and a lot of luck to get through to them. At 15, especially if she's not willing to do the work, there's not much you can do unless you can find a good Residential Treatment Center (RTC) that specializes in Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) (and you have the funds to pay for it). You might also see if there is an adoption therapist in your area and try family counseling with that psychologist -- they usually have a lot of experience with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) kids. If you haven't read it, checkout Keck's Raising the Hurt Child. It can give you some insight into the Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) aspects. That being said, praying for 18 is not that unreasonable of a goal, sadly to say. You have my sympathies.</p><p></p><p>From what I've seen in a friend's son with aspergers, inflated ego is not that uncommon. Actually, his ego was pretty realistic -- he was more intelligent than 95% of the people he knew, a talented artist -- he just didn't hesitate to let you know how good he was and how good you weren't. He didn't see it as an ego issue but rather a simple statement of fact. Sounds like your son is pretty much the same way. If you can find a way to teach him empathy, it would probably help with his ego. Maybe get him (or the entire family) to volunteer at a local shelter or something like that. It is hard to teach a kid with no understanding of emotions to try to feel what others do. Again, a therapist may be the best way to go for him -- someone who will respect (at least for a little while) who can work on teaching him that others really do have feelings. Not an easy task, especially when someone is in the egocentric world of teenagedom.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 101704, member: 3626"] Hi and welcome. Sounds like you already know a lot of what is going on in your kids' lives and that's a huge step forward. Having a Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) kid is something on this side of pure misery. It takes a lot of therapy, a lot of interventions and a lot of luck to get through to them. At 15, especially if she's not willing to do the work, there's not much you can do unless you can find a good Residential Treatment Center (RTC) that specializes in Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) (and you have the funds to pay for it). You might also see if there is an adoption therapist in your area and try family counseling with that psychologist -- they usually have a lot of experience with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) kids. If you haven't read it, checkout Keck's Raising the Hurt Child. It can give you some insight into the Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) aspects. That being said, praying for 18 is not that unreasonable of a goal, sadly to say. You have my sympathies. From what I've seen in a friend's son with aspergers, inflated ego is not that uncommon. Actually, his ego was pretty realistic -- he was more intelligent than 95% of the people he knew, a talented artist -- he just didn't hesitate to let you know how good he was and how good you weren't. He didn't see it as an ego issue but rather a simple statement of fact. Sounds like your son is pretty much the same way. If you can find a way to teach him empathy, it would probably help with his ego. Maybe get him (or the entire family) to volunteer at a local shelter or something like that. It is hard to teach a kid with no understanding of emotions to try to feel what others do. Again, a therapist may be the best way to go for him -- someone who will respect (at least for a little while) who can work on teaching him that others really do have feelings. Not an easy task, especially when someone is in the egocentric world of teenagedom. [/QUOTE]
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