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Introduction: I'm not alone
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<blockquote data-quote="2much2recover" data-source="post: 650783" data-attributes="member: 18366"><p>The reason I thought is was important, right now as I look at the board we have 225 guests not posting. Obviously through the recent change of difficult child to D C this board is trying to attract new posters. Just because it is always the way something has been done, doesn't make it always right. While I respect your opinion MWM, that it should have been posted in PM, however others wouldn't have benefited including all those who read the posts but are afraid to tell their stories. They also would not have seen that others, like myself, disagree with how a new poster is sometimes being mistreated and or understand that the group as a whole is not stuck in negativity or afraid that their stories will too be judged. I just don't believe we hit people with things like accusing them of being an alcoholic pre-natal and then expect people who may have done it and have now changed their ways to post after they see judgmental comments (or other such situations). I think it is always best for a new poster to get out their own story first, and once you know their story comments and suggestions can be made. I realize that this is not a PROFESSIONAL REGULATED board, (I realized that after some crap I saw going on around the holidays) however that makes it even more important for us to self-regulate what we say and how we address others. Mutual respect is never a bad thing. Ever. In a real life group the person making the misstep would be called out on their inappropriate behavior - I hope you are not suggesting that everyone just post whatever without first looking at the purpose or the consequences. Or the long time members don't have it in them to accept criticism when they offer hurtful suggestions?? If that's the way it's always been done, and the group has less posters than non-posters, maybe that's one of the reasons and maybe it is time for a change.</p><p></p><p>It concerns me to see so many "readers" and they are not posting - it also makes me wonder why and then I will see a comment and understand why. I have both considered leaving myself, and PMed people to convince them not to leave after harsh statements were directed at them. I have personally witnessed posters doing what in therapy is called "transference" where the poster was taking out their own foul moods on others and it ain't pretty.</p><p></p><p>As for wiped out, I am glad that your feelings were not hurt and you feel comfortable to stick around!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="2much2recover, post: 650783, member: 18366"] The reason I thought is was important, right now as I look at the board we have 225 guests not posting. Obviously through the recent change of difficult child to D C this board is trying to attract new posters. Just because it is always the way something has been done, doesn't make it always right. While I respect your opinion MWM, that it should have been posted in PM, however others wouldn't have benefited including all those who read the posts but are afraid to tell their stories. They also would not have seen that others, like myself, disagree with how a new poster is sometimes being mistreated and or understand that the group as a whole is not stuck in negativity or afraid that their stories will too be judged. I just don't believe we hit people with things like accusing them of being an alcoholic pre-natal and then expect people who may have done it and have now changed their ways to post after they see judgmental comments (or other such situations). I think it is always best for a new poster to get out their own story first, and once you know their story comments and suggestions can be made. I realize that this is not a PROFESSIONAL REGULATED board, (I realized that after some crap I saw going on around the holidays) however that makes it even more important for us to self-regulate what we say and how we address others. Mutual respect is never a bad thing. Ever. In a real life group the person making the misstep would be called out on their inappropriate behavior - I hope you are not suggesting that everyone just post whatever without first looking at the purpose or the consequences. Or the long time members don't have it in them to accept criticism when they offer hurtful suggestions?? If that's the way it's always been done, and the group has less posters than non-posters, maybe that's one of the reasons and maybe it is time for a change. It concerns me to see so many "readers" and they are not posting - it also makes me wonder why and then I will see a comment and understand why. I have both considered leaving myself, and PMed people to convince them not to leave after harsh statements were directed at them. I have personally witnessed posters doing what in therapy is called "transference" where the poster was taking out their own foul moods on others and it ain't pretty. As for wiped out, I am glad that your feelings were not hurt and you feel comfortable to stick around! [/QUOTE]
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