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Is anyone happily married
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<blockquote data-quote="hearts and roses" data-source="post: 41302" data-attributes="member: 2211"><p>I have been married for almost 11 years (my H is my dds' stepdad) and I would say that we are 'mostly' happy. lol</p><p></p><p>We've had some very difficult and trying times, both due to difficult child and just our stuff. It IS a work in progress. When I think about in a few years when my girls are grown and on their own, I think that H and I will be happier...IF he continues to be sober and IF we continue to try and respect one another's difference of opinion. We're both very independent and definitely do not see eye to eye on everything. We both have had major trust issues but we're okay. I'd say that right now we're in a holding pattern and we're becoming better 'friends' - I would like it to be more than just that (I'd love to have some of the old passion back &lt;blush&gt;. It is hard to explain here in this little box, but H takes a long time to make decisions and his old fashioned upbringing often gets in our way, but I have my controlling issues to contend with as well. So...no it's not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but I don't think any marriages are today. Each party comes to a marriage with different expectations and it's hard to compromise when both parties are trying to be in charge, Know what I mean?? Having a difficult child, in my opinion, just serves to compound those already existing conditions and that makes it hard.</p><p></p><p>However, all that said, neither H not I are abusive in any way and I know that we genuinely love and respect one another and we want to grow old together. We're proud of the way we raised our daughters and he's been more implemental in that regard more than I give him credit for at times. H is a stand up kind of guy, he's a hard worker, he takes his responsibilities and committments very seriously and he comes hom every night. All of that is more than I can say about my relationship with exh and the kind of father he's been. </p><p></p><p>Each relationship is different and what you bring to it is just as important as what you get from it, and vice versa.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hearts and roses, post: 41302, member: 2211"] I have been married for almost 11 years (my H is my dds' stepdad) and I would say that we are 'mostly' happy. lol We've had some very difficult and trying times, both due to difficult child and just our stuff. It IS a work in progress. When I think about in a few years when my girls are grown and on their own, I think that H and I will be happier...IF he continues to be sober and IF we continue to try and respect one another's difference of opinion. We're both very independent and definitely do not see eye to eye on everything. We both have had major trust issues but we're okay. I'd say that right now we're in a holding pattern and we're becoming better 'friends' - I would like it to be more than just that (I'd love to have some of the old passion back <blush>. It is hard to explain here in this little box, but H takes a long time to make decisions and his old fashioned upbringing often gets in our way, but I have my controlling issues to contend with as well. So...no it's not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but I don't think any marriages are today. Each party comes to a marriage with different expectations and it's hard to compromise when both parties are trying to be in charge, Know what I mean?? Having a difficult child, in my opinion, just serves to compound those already existing conditions and that makes it hard. However, all that said, neither H not I are abusive in any way and I know that we genuinely love and respect one another and we want to grow old together. We're proud of the way we raised our daughters and he's been more implemental in that regard more than I give him credit for at times. H is a stand up kind of guy, he's a hard worker, he takes his responsibilities and committments very seriously and he comes hom every night. All of that is more than I can say about my relationship with exh and the kind of father he's been. Each relationship is different and what you bring to it is just as important as what you get from it, and vice versa. [/QUOTE]
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