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General Parenting
Is it time to burst his bubble? How to do it gently...?
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<blockquote data-quote="gcvmom" data-source="post: 351893" data-attributes="member: 3444"><p>Well, husband is afraid that I patholigze and over analyze every little quirky thing that difficult child 2 exhibits. I think that's part of his issue with me. </p><p> </p><p>On the other hand, what Marg points out about overlap of autistic traits and bipolar and the whole fantastical/belief system zeal strikes a chord with me and what I see in people in husband's family... certain faces popped into my mind and I'm nodding my head thinking, yup, that's uncle so-and-so, that's pappap, that's... So it's hard for me to NOT believe that some of this is part and parcel of difficult child 2's "disorder". He may not be an official "Aspie" but there are SO many things he does and says that leave me wondering. </p><p> </p><p>And in that vein, we have a neighbor with a strong family hx of bipolar (father, brother (who also committed suicide) who is similarly "quirky", empassioned by his belief system, often comes out with very strange comments that make you wonder about his perception of "reality"...</p><p> </p><p>But I digress.</p><p> </p><p>When difficult child 2 was confronted by his classmates last year, I addressed the maltreatment and not the issue of the belief itself. When pressed on this issue in the past, I've replied with the statement that if you don't believe in Santa, he doesn't come to your house (simultaneously accounting for the classmates who are Jewish or Muslim or Buddhist or... and have different belief systems). Maybe he is afraid of losing those gifts, maybe it felt like a threat! (I sure didn't try to convey it that way!) ALthough those aren't the only gifts he gets. </p><p> </p><p>We did not attempt to hide the fact that husband hid the eggs in the yard this year. And nobody batted an eye, not even difficult child 2.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="gcvmom, post: 351893, member: 3444"] Well, husband is afraid that I patholigze and over analyze every little quirky thing that difficult child 2 exhibits. I think that's part of his issue with me. On the other hand, what Marg points out about overlap of autistic traits and bipolar and the whole fantastical/belief system zeal strikes a chord with me and what I see in people in husband's family... certain faces popped into my mind and I'm nodding my head thinking, yup, that's uncle so-and-so, that's pappap, that's... So it's hard for me to NOT believe that some of this is part and parcel of difficult child 2's "disorder". He may not be an official "Aspie" but there are SO many things he does and says that leave me wondering. And in that vein, we have a neighbor with a strong family hx of bipolar (father, brother (who also committed suicide) who is similarly "quirky", empassioned by his belief system, often comes out with very strange comments that make you wonder about his perception of "reality"... But I digress. When difficult child 2 was confronted by his classmates last year, I addressed the maltreatment and not the issue of the belief itself. When pressed on this issue in the past, I've replied with the statement that if you don't believe in Santa, he doesn't come to your house (simultaneously accounting for the classmates who are Jewish or Muslim or Buddhist or... and have different belief systems). Maybe he is afraid of losing those gifts, maybe it felt like a threat! (I sure didn't try to convey it that way!) ALthough those aren't the only gifts he gets. We did not attempt to hide the fact that husband hid the eggs in the yard this year. And nobody batted an eye, not even difficult child 2. [/QUOTE]
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