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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 192377" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>I can relate to this sort of incident. I didn't catch what grade your son is in, but I'm assuming he's either in 4th, 5th, or 6th, and I see he's 10 yo. This is the time when teachers are trying to get students settled in for middle school and the difficult child has already gotten some sort of reputation and their hormones are starting to get a little awry. </p><p></p><p>We went through the same sort of issues. I don't feel that I can give you much advice because difficult child and I botched this period pretty much. I do agree that keeping in contact with school authorities should help minimize issues as much as possible. But, I wish I hadn't taken the school's side as much as I did, in hindsight. difficult child did have many valid complaints that I didn't know about until later. His teachers were smarting off humiliating comments to him in front of the whole class and the principal really was trying to get him out of the school. I just kept hearing stories like you just relayed. But later, there was enough evidence that even a ploiceman took my side over the principal's. </p><p></p><p>Anyway, it is a fine line we walk as a parent of a difficult child. If your son is in his last year of elementary school, I would suggest trying to keep everything as calm as possible until the school year is over. Is he on an IEP? If they keep having issues, I would call a meeting and have them tweak the IEP to "meet his and their needs better". If he's not on an IEP, I'd suggest pursuing one. As far as his story not matching their's, I felt just like you did but wish I had kept more communication going with my son so I could have learned about other things going on- like him having signs of depression and anxiety in class that he was getting punished for. </p><p></p><p>I guess the safest way to deal with all of it is to have a meeting with all involved if it keeps on. But, instead of just accepting their answers like "he was disrupting class", I wish I'd pushed a lot sooner to get the specifics of how exactly and what exactly was he doing. Then, I would have known 6 mos sooner that my son was shutting down in class, picking at himself until he bled, etc. He would get belittled in class, then 15 mins later be in the hallway doing something he shouldn't. All I heard was that he disrupted class, then misbehaved in the hall. </p><p></p><p>What I'm trying to say is that I don't doubt he is disruptive in some way, but sometimes those are signs that soomething needs to get addressed at school that isn't meeting his needs. I hope that helps. If nothing else, know that others have been there done that and I feel your pain. It is sooo frustrating.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 192377, member: 3699"] I can relate to this sort of incident. I didn't catch what grade your son is in, but I'm assuming he's either in 4th, 5th, or 6th, and I see he's 10 yo. This is the time when teachers are trying to get students settled in for middle school and the difficult child has already gotten some sort of reputation and their hormones are starting to get a little awry. We went through the same sort of issues. I don't feel that I can give you much advice because difficult child and I botched this period pretty much. I do agree that keeping in contact with school authorities should help minimize issues as much as possible. But, I wish I hadn't taken the school's side as much as I did, in hindsight. difficult child did have many valid complaints that I didn't know about until later. His teachers were smarting off humiliating comments to him in front of the whole class and the principal really was trying to get him out of the school. I just kept hearing stories like you just relayed. But later, there was enough evidence that even a ploiceman took my side over the principal's. Anyway, it is a fine line we walk as a parent of a difficult child. If your son is in his last year of elementary school, I would suggest trying to keep everything as calm as possible until the school year is over. Is he on an IEP? If they keep having issues, I would call a meeting and have them tweak the IEP to "meet his and their needs better". If he's not on an IEP, I'd suggest pursuing one. As far as his story not matching their's, I felt just like you did but wish I had kept more communication going with my son so I could have learned about other things going on- like him having signs of depression and anxiety in class that he was getting punished for. I guess the safest way to deal with all of it is to have a meeting with all involved if it keeps on. But, instead of just accepting their answers like "he was disrupting class", I wish I'd pushed a lot sooner to get the specifics of how exactly and what exactly was he doing. Then, I would have known 6 mos sooner that my son was shutting down in class, picking at himself until he bled, etc. He would get belittled in class, then 15 mins later be in the hallway doing something he shouldn't. All I heard was that he disrupted class, then misbehaved in the hall. What I'm trying to say is that I don't doubt he is disruptive in some way, but sometimes those are signs that soomething needs to get addressed at school that isn't meeting his needs. I hope that helps. If nothing else, know that others have been there done that and I feel your pain. It is sooo frustrating. [/QUOTE]
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