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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 527346"><p>Janet - with several of your posts you seem to feel that those of us on this SA part of the board need to let go more than we already are. I am wondering what exactly you mean? It seems to me than many of us here are letting go an enormous amount, more than many parents of 18-22 year olds.</p><p></p><p>I cant speak for anyone else but really I don't see how I can let go anymore than I already am.... unless it is to the point of not worrying at all, not thinking about them at all, basically completely writing them out of my thoughts and minds and my life. And then somehow having it not matter to me that I have done that.</p><p></p><p>I have made a real shift in the last few months... with the help of my alanon group. I am going on with my life. I am able to focus on work, except when there is an immediate crisis at least. I go out with friends, I have fun with my easy child daughter, I go out with my husband. You may not see it all here because this is where I come with my fear and my worry.</p><p></p><p>I have definitely given up trying to control my son or what he is doing. Yes I am giving him options and yes I am willing to help him when he wants help. I am not giving him any money, I am not rescuing him from living on the street or from his drug addiction (if I could rescue him from that I would but I know I can't).</p><p></p><p>So really in what ways should I let go that I am not doing?</p><p></p><p>TL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 527346"] Janet - with several of your posts you seem to feel that those of us on this SA part of the board need to let go more than we already are. I am wondering what exactly you mean? It seems to me than many of us here are letting go an enormous amount, more than many parents of 18-22 year olds. I cant speak for anyone else but really I don't see how I can let go anymore than I already am.... unless it is to the point of not worrying at all, not thinking about them at all, basically completely writing them out of my thoughts and minds and my life. And then somehow having it not matter to me that I have done that. I have made a real shift in the last few months... with the help of my alanon group. I am going on with my life. I am able to focus on work, except when there is an immediate crisis at least. I go out with friends, I have fun with my easy child daughter, I go out with my husband. You may not see it all here because this is where I come with my fear and my worry. I have definitely given up trying to control my son or what he is doing. Yes I am giving him options and yes I am willing to help him when he wants help. I am not giving him any money, I am not rescuing him from living on the street or from his drug addiction (if I could rescue him from that I would but I know I can't). So really in what ways should I let go that I am not doing? TL [/QUOTE]
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