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General Parenting
just a thought...am i crazy for feeling sorry for
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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 112647" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>It's one thing to feel compassion for someone as you go through the process of forgiving them- this is a good thing and what I hope you're going through. It's another to start feeling like they wouldn't be this way if they'd been rescued, I pity them, I'll rescue them. That's not healthy because you can't recuse him and when people do that, they are really trying to fulfill a need of their own. Even if it's true that maybe he could have turned out differently, the reality is that you can't go back in time and be that person, he's already turned out to be who he's going to be. I think it's good that you're also thinking about making sure your kids don't turn out that way, if you can help it. Maybe you can't prevent this from being their destiny either, but my point is, you can't control who "should" have been there for H, you can control what efforts and choices you make for your children and yourself now, so I'd concentrate on that.</p><p></p><p>But, again, if you're just going through the process to reach forgiveness and peace, there's nothing wrong with compassion.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 112647, member: 3699"] It's one thing to feel compassion for someone as you go through the process of forgiving them- this is a good thing and what I hope you're going through. It's another to start feeling like they wouldn't be this way if they'd been rescued, I pity them, I'll rescue them. That's not healthy because you can't recuse him and when people do that, they are really trying to fulfill a need of their own. Even if it's true that maybe he could have turned out differently, the reality is that you can't go back in time and be that person, he's already turned out to be who he's going to be. I think it's good that you're also thinking about making sure your kids don't turn out that way, if you can help it. Maybe you can't prevent this from being their destiny either, but my point is, you can't control who "should" have been there for H, you can control what efforts and choices you make for your children and yourself now, so I'd concentrate on that. But, again, if you're just going through the process to reach forgiveness and peace, there's nothing wrong with compassion. [/QUOTE]
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just a thought...am i crazy for feeling sorry for
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