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Just found something telling about difficult child
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 333973" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>My daughter was the same way.She also has a good heart and always did and did not have the mindset of a thug. But the fact is, the most accepting group are the bad kids. I've talked about this with MY therapists. My daughter was a new kid at school and nobody sat with her at lunch. She was alone for a few months when a few of the bad kids sat with her and recruited her, so to speak. And she finally had friends. </p><p></p><p>The sad truth is that the good kids are the least accepting. They don't mean to be that way, but they have their friends and their lives and do not open their arms to others. Even if your child were to suddenly turn it around, most likely, like my daughter, his old friends would start to harass him to go back to the way he was and the good kids wouldn't even notice. </p><p></p><p>I don't know what to do about the problem. Once a kid has a rep, it's hard to shake it too. All I know is what I was told by my therapist and my daughter, who is now clean, and my own school experiences. That's why you can talk to your son yet he sees a different reality, perhaps. Hopefully someone else can come along with useful suggestions. I never did find a way to change anything. My daughter had to move to another state in order to change and she was lonely for a long time. She still doesn't have as many friends as she had when she was doing drugs...good luck.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 333973, member: 1550"] My daughter was the same way.She also has a good heart and always did and did not have the mindset of a thug. But the fact is, the most accepting group are the bad kids. I've talked about this with MY therapists. My daughter was a new kid at school and nobody sat with her at lunch. She was alone for a few months when a few of the bad kids sat with her and recruited her, so to speak. And she finally had friends. The sad truth is that the good kids are the least accepting. They don't mean to be that way, but they have their friends and their lives and do not open their arms to others. Even if your child were to suddenly turn it around, most likely, like my daughter, his old friends would start to harass him to go back to the way he was and the good kids wouldn't even notice. I don't know what to do about the problem. Once a kid has a rep, it's hard to shake it too. All I know is what I was told by my therapist and my daughter, who is now clean, and my own school experiences. That's why you can talk to your son yet he sees a different reality, perhaps. Hopefully someone else can come along with useful suggestions. I never did find a way to change anything. My daughter had to move to another state in order to change and she was lonely for a long time. She still doesn't have as many friends as she had when she was doing drugs...good luck. [/QUOTE]
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