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Substance Abuse
Just Got Another Phone Call...... GHG hates her life but not enough to quit drinking
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 609221" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Onlyone, I am so very sorry. All any of us can do under those circumstances is learn how to detach. And, I am profoundly aware of how heartbreaking and difficult that is. Sometimes our adult kids leave us no other choice. </p><p></p><p>There is an article at the bottom of my post here on detachment which may be of some help to you.</p><p></p><p>I too have a grown daughter with mental issues who won't get help. I have no idea how she pays her bills either. Like you, we've tried allowing her to live here temporarily but it can't work, she has little regard for anyone else. </p><p></p><p>Detaching from my daughter's choices has been a very difficult path for me. My best advice to you would be to get yourself as much support as you can........I had private therapy, a parent support group facilitated by a therapist, 12 step groups and I contacted NAMI (the National Alliance on Mental Illness, they have excellent courses for parents) When we become acutely aware of our powerlessness and lack of control to be able to help our kids, it is so challenging for us that many of us require professional support. </p><p></p><p>We have to take the focus off of them, off of their lives and their choices and put that focus on ourselves so we can retrieve our lives. Little by little I gained momentum in that and remarkably, I am once again joining life. All the support was what pushed me from despair, guilt and fear over to a sense of well being. It wasn't easy, but when faced with the utter powerlessness, there really is no other choice which will remove you from all of that suffering.</p><p></p><p>Many here recite the serenity prayer which offers some solace. </p><p></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'Georgia'">"God grant me the serenity </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'Georgia'">to accept the things I cannot change; </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'Georgia'">courage to change the things I can;</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'Georgia'">and wisdom to know the difference."</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'Georgia'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'Georgia'"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Georgia'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000">It helps to keep posting. I'm glad you found us. I wish you peace.</span></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 609221, member: 13542"] Onlyone, I am so very sorry. All any of us can do under those circumstances is learn how to detach. And, I am profoundly aware of how heartbreaking and difficult that is. Sometimes our adult kids leave us no other choice. There is an article at the bottom of my post here on detachment which may be of some help to you. I too have a grown daughter with mental issues who won't get help. I have no idea how she pays her bills either. Like you, we've tried allowing her to live here temporarily but it can't work, she has little regard for anyone else. Detaching from my daughter's choices has been a very difficult path for me. My best advice to you would be to get yourself as much support as you can........I had private therapy, a parent support group facilitated by a therapist, 12 step groups and I contacted NAMI (the National Alliance on Mental Illness, they have excellent courses for parents) When we become acutely aware of our powerlessness and lack of control to be able to help our kids, it is so challenging for us that many of us require professional support. We have to take the focus off of them, off of their lives and their choices and put that focus on ourselves so we can retrieve our lives. Little by little I gained momentum in that and remarkably, I am once again joining life. All the support was what pushed me from despair, guilt and fear over to a sense of well being. It wasn't easy, but when faced with the utter powerlessness, there really is no other choice which will remove you from all of that suffering. Many here recite the serenity prayer which offers some solace. [COLOR=#000000][FONT=Georgia]"God grant me the serenity [/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=#000000][FONT=Georgia]to accept the things I cannot change; [/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=#000000][FONT=Georgia]courage to change the things I can;[/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=#000000][FONT=Georgia]and wisdom to know the difference." [/FONT][/COLOR][FONT=Georgia][SIZE=3][COLOR=#000000]It helps to keep posting. I'm glad you found us. I wish you peace.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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Just Got Another Phone Call...... GHG hates her life but not enough to quit drinking
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