Kanga's on run

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by JJJ, Sep 16, 2011.

  1. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    I hate being right. The Residential Treatment Center (RTC) was giving Kanga 5 minutes of 'unsupervised' free time as she had earned level 2 and girls normally get more free time. I think tonight was her first "5 minutes". She's been gone almost 5 hours. She ran with her "boyfriend". Yep, the one who she has only ever talked to for a few minutes here and there during school. It's about 50 degrees where she is. Residential Treatment Center (RTC) sent 5 staff members in separate cars to canvas the town and no sight of them. Police were notified immediately (Residential Treatment Center (RTC) keeps up-to-date digital pictures of the kids so they can text them over to the cops at a moments notice.) Current thought is that they ran the wrong way and instead of heading into town (which is only a 30 minute walk at most) that they headed away from town and are now lost amoung the beautiful, monotonous farmland.

    Kanga's mentor (a staff person assigned to be sort of a big brother) is beside himself. He keeps hoping that she's going to walk back in, that they won't have had sex and that she'll have hated run so much she'll never do it again. He has nice dreams, doesn't he? He is such a great guy and he does seem to get Kanga, I think he knows how bad this is and is just so sad.

    We're trying very hard not to let the littles overhear anything. husband and I reviewed the plan if she shows up. No child will be left home without an adult until she is found. I doubt she can figure out a way to travel over 300 miles without any money, but that girl is resourseful. My biggest concern is that this wasn't an impulsive run and that she had enough money for a train/bus ticket. We won't know until tomorrow if that was possible.

    I told them that if the cops find her and she gives them any lip, I'm 100% find with her spending a few hours in lock-up. Maybe if this first overnight run can be as unpleasant as possible, she'll think twice before running again.

    I'm out at the reservation this weekend so I doubt I'll be able to post again until Sunday night. So don't worry if you don't hear anyuthing until then.
  2. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Oh no.

    Hoping first of all that the rest of you stay safe, then hoping they find Kanga...
  3. TeDo

    TeDo Guest

    Wow.I think you're right, this sounds very planned. You'd think that and Residential Treatment Center (RTC) would know better. but then again......
    Hopefully she is at least safe and is eventually found. It's gotta make you wonder though. Hmmmmm Enjoy your week-end.
  4. Liahona

    Liahona Guest

    Well. Residential Treatment Center (RTC) won't do that again. Maybe they'll listen to you about the amount of freedom to give her. Hope they find her safe and soon. It does sound planned if she took off with someone and was only alone for 5 min.
  5. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    Oh, stupid me agreed to the 5 minutes. Logic being (1) if we never gave her a chance to show that she had learned, why would she keep trying to be better (2) since she kept pushing the idea that she hadn't done anything bad at this Residential Treatment Center (RTC), they were having difficulty getting her to engage in that part of therapy. Guess she's got plenty to work on now.

    Swing shift was suppose to let night shift know to call me no matter what time it was if she is found. Lovely staff just called to tell me "she's still missing". She read the message wrong and thought she was suppose to call me either way.
  6. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    More {{hugs}}

    Better that, than mis-reading it, Kanga actually being found, and no call.
    Last edited: Sep 16, 2011
  7. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Hugs, JJJ. Sounds to me like she had a plan as well.
  8. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It


    I'm sorry she ran. It doesn't seem like it would be an impulse - how would she have known he was free and could run with her. Thankfully she has birth control, so while sex is a worry, babies are far less of a worry.

    Poor mentor guy, it is hard when you try so hard to trust them and they pull koi like this. I hope they are gone long enough to be really cold and hungry. Maybe it will rain on them and make them more miserable?

    I still think it was right to allow the "freedom". She will be 18 soon and then she will have a lot more choices/opportunities to do this koi. So maybe this will help her learn (one can dream, right?) and it will teach the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) to not fall into her games.

  9. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    ((((Hugs)))) I hope by now she has been found so you don't need to worry about her showing up. Sending up prayers.
  10. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    They called at 2:30am. The police found them sleeping at a playground.

    I think Kanga is in for a big shock. Per the mentor, she will basically go back to the beginning of the program and start over -- level 1, no extras, restricted to campus, etc. Plus her safety plan will be back at 100%. And it is very likely she will be fired from her job (as she already had strikes 1 and 2 plus level 1s can't work).
  11. Marcie Mac

    Marcie Mac Just Plain Ole Tired

    I think this is the first time I have gone from heart stopper to releif in a total of 9 posts LOL. Am glad they found them, but think there will come a time she is resourseful enough to go by herself and not be found sad to say. But at least she is ok.

  12. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    I'm glad everyone is safe.
  13. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Phew/Whew! Time to exhale, thank heavens. I'm so glad she's safe and really happy that you all don't have to keep worrying. Hugs. DDD
  14. cubsgirl

    cubsgirl Well-Known Member

    I'm so glad that she was found safe. Kanga is probably in for a shock with no more privileges/job. She doesn't seem to understand consequences.
  15. slsh

    slsh member since 1999

    So many positives here - really.
    1. Staff took her running seriously (flashing back to umpteen gazillion midnight calls where thank you was "AWOL" and a missing persons report was filed - but that was it).
    2. Police actually *looked* for her.
    3. Geographically, if you're going to have a runner, I would rather have one where she is rather than in the city.

    I know the worry, and I'm glad you and husband have plans in place as far as sibs. While I think she's more focused on her own wants (center-of-the-universe syndrome) and it's probably unlikely she'd come after them or you, I think it's very wise to have contingencies in place.

    on the other hand, she's crossed a new line at Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and ... well, let's face it, for some of our kids there are simply no consequences that will deter them. Hopefully staff will get that and truly keep her on 100%.

    I'm so sorry - those middle-of-the-night calls really are heart-stopping. Hope you have a restful weekend.
  16. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    I'm with-MarcieMac. Whew!
    I am glad she is back. I'm sure she will have every excuse in the book. Bravo about sending her to the beginning of the program.
    Yeah, her mentor is wearing rose colored glasses. Sigh. But so many of them do; that's why they're in that field.
    A playground makes perfect sense. I will keep that in mind when it's our turn. :(
    Try to get some sleep. I'm sure you are totally stressed out and exhausted.
  17. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    Wow, what an emotional roller coaster of a night for you. I am glad she was found, and hope she is reminded every time she asks why she cannot do such and such, that they remind her of what happened. I think our kids sometimes somehow manage to forget what really happen, or they cannot accurately realize how their actions impact others.
  18. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    Oh wow - it never ends does it. I am so sorry. Sending positive energy your way.
  19. keista

    keista New Member

    Sorry this happened, but glad she was found "relatively" quickly.
  20. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    So glad they were found safe, hope both kids and the staff learned something socially useful from this.