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Kido not knowing when to stop!?
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<blockquote data-quote="Allan-Matlem" data-source="post: 456328" data-attributes="member: 10"><p>I have said it before and echo Ross Greene's words , that most dxs are mostly descriptive and even the ones that mention skills still get people focused on the way they look bad and not under what conditions they look bad. A kid is not Aspie every minute of the day ( in any case each aspie kid is very different ) so we have to find those situations when the demands placed on the kid outstrip his skills and start working on actually solving these relaible and predictable problems.</p><p>kids are complex and often sharing lagging skills with kids of different disorders. Kids have problems with executive functions, social skills , cognitive flexibility= black white thinkers, emotional regulation , language processing skills</p><p></p><p>For sure we can teach some of these skills directly , but we would be served better if we would also start working on specific problems , not being so vague and general , gather info about the child's concerns, define the problem, brainstorm etc , not easy but the more we practice the better we and the kid get at solving problems</p><p></p><p>Mum - it is the experience here and that of Ross Greene - Plan A = you your power and asseriveness to enforce behavior does not teach lagging skills and even worse causes more meltdowns . Plan C - putting behaviors on the shelf in the meantime , helps to reduce conflict and relax the atmosphere , making it conducive to working with a kid. A kid made to look good using rewards and punishment does not last long.</p><p></p><p>Brain research shows that engaging the child's ' thinking brain ' preforontal lobes rather than the emotional or animal brain using power leads to growth and development of the brain.</p><p></p><p>It is not easy , mentors are helpful - good for thinking , building trust important so kids feel safe to learn</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Allan-Matlem, post: 456328, member: 10"] I have said it before and echo Ross Greene's words , that most dxs are mostly descriptive and even the ones that mention skills still get people focused on the way they look bad and not under what conditions they look bad. A kid is not Aspie every minute of the day ( in any case each aspie kid is very different ) so we have to find those situations when the demands placed on the kid outstrip his skills and start working on actually solving these relaible and predictable problems. kids are complex and often sharing lagging skills with kids of different disorders. Kids have problems with executive functions, social skills , cognitive flexibility= black white thinkers, emotional regulation , language processing skills For sure we can teach some of these skills directly , but we would be served better if we would also start working on specific problems , not being so vague and general , gather info about the child's concerns, define the problem, brainstorm etc , not easy but the more we practice the better we and the kid get at solving problems Mum - it is the experience here and that of Ross Greene - Plan A = you your power and asseriveness to enforce behavior does not teach lagging skills and even worse causes more meltdowns . Plan C - putting behaviors on the shelf in the meantime , helps to reduce conflict and relax the atmosphere , making it conducive to working with a kid. A kid made to look good using rewards and punishment does not last long. Brain research shows that engaging the child's ' thinking brain ' preforontal lobes rather than the emotional or animal brain using power leads to growth and development of the brain. It is not easy , mentors are helpful - good for thinking , building trust important so kids feel safe to learn [/QUOTE]
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