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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 593576" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>I have seen this in my own kids. thank you is super smart and in many ways has an excellent memory, but ask him to find something and he cannot. He can even pick the item up and move it to see if what he is looking for is underneath itself. He will truly not know he is holding what he is looking for until someone says something to him. thank you does not ask for help either. Last Sun he took a shower and the cold water handle broke off when he went to turn it off. He called J, very quietly, to come to the bathroom after he put a towel on. I was up and he could have called me. He didn't. He and J BOTH were speaking quietly and I could tell something was wrong but they NEVER used the word help or even asked for anyone to come to the bathroom. Water was spraying out from the pipe behind the wall and it was leaking down from inside the wall all over the floor. I waited five min and then insisted they tell me what was wrong. Really bad knees and hips that day, so getting up took a minute. </p><p></p><p>Neither of them showed ANY urgency for getting help. Or for actually doing anything but talking to each other. It blew my mind because he is 13 and she is 17. I kno they didn't wnat to bother us, but really, this was dumb. </p><p></p><p>I made each of them practice asking for help. Made them actually say the words with urgency in their voices. </p><p>As it turned out, even after the water to our entire building was cut off, the water still kept spraying full force. They had to shut off water to five buildings to get it to stop! Whoever was the orig plumber for these apartments thought the code book was a gentle suggestion to consider, at least from the stuff like this that has happened.</p><p></p><p>Part of it is just a lack of confidence, part a brain glitch that will need time, patience, maturity and hard work to overcome. I have knows a LOT of people who could do something in one setting but not in others. V may need a 1:1 aide if that is possible at school, someone to help him learn to link things.</p><p></p><p>I have a theory that some people are lumpers and some are not. Being a lumper isn't bad, it is a way of thinking. To a lumper, as a baby all women are mom, all men are dad. Some people just don't outgrow it. </p><p></p><p>It has taken a LOT of work and role playing and social stories to help get the brain glitch sorted out. It will take that with your V. PUSH for a 1:1 for next year for him. It iwll help.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 593576, member: 1233"] I have seen this in my own kids. thank you is super smart and in many ways has an excellent memory, but ask him to find something and he cannot. He can even pick the item up and move it to see if what he is looking for is underneath itself. He will truly not know he is holding what he is looking for until someone says something to him. thank you does not ask for help either. Last Sun he took a shower and the cold water handle broke off when he went to turn it off. He called J, very quietly, to come to the bathroom after he put a towel on. I was up and he could have called me. He didn't. He and J BOTH were speaking quietly and I could tell something was wrong but they NEVER used the word help or even asked for anyone to come to the bathroom. Water was spraying out from the pipe behind the wall and it was leaking down from inside the wall all over the floor. I waited five min and then insisted they tell me what was wrong. Really bad knees and hips that day, so getting up took a minute. Neither of them showed ANY urgency for getting help. Or for actually doing anything but talking to each other. It blew my mind because he is 13 and she is 17. I kno they didn't wnat to bother us, but really, this was dumb. I made each of them practice asking for help. Made them actually say the words with urgency in their voices. As it turned out, even after the water to our entire building was cut off, the water still kept spraying full force. They had to shut off water to five buildings to get it to stop! Whoever was the orig plumber for these apartments thought the code book was a gentle suggestion to consider, at least from the stuff like this that has happened. Part of it is just a lack of confidence, part a brain glitch that will need time, patience, maturity and hard work to overcome. I have knows a LOT of people who could do something in one setting but not in others. V may need a 1:1 aide if that is possible at school, someone to help him learn to link things. I have a theory that some people are lumpers and some are not. Being a lumper isn't bad, it is a way of thinking. To a lumper, as a baby all women are mom, all men are dad. Some people just don't outgrow it. It has taken a LOT of work and role playing and social stories to help get the brain glitch sorted out. It will take that with your V. PUSH for a 1:1 for next year for him. It iwll help. [/QUOTE]
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