Last few days

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by bigbear11, May 13, 2012.

  1. bigbear11

    bigbear11 Guest

    So… here was my last few days. Had been a great week…but nothing last forever.
    Friday afternoon she wanted to go bike riding… not a problem. I typically just walk along behind. Well for some reason she got “wound up”… riding way far ahead (in our small subdivision so quite safe but still…) and then refusing to stop when it was time. Wanted to keep going and starting “you can’t catch me”. Told her that if she took the bike by herself that when she got home the bike would be locked in the basement for a few days. So she came back on the bike but then started running away down the street. Neighbor kids walked her home… I had refused to chase her. Then she took off again laughing and in a really weird almost manic state. It was getting dark and I went after her that time. When I caught up to her… virtually had to drag her home.
    On Saturday we had had a great morning…. TRex wanted to go to Chick Fila for lunch to play. I had some errands… Target and Publix. So she went with me. We stopped at Chick Fila first…ordered lunch… she went to play. 5 Minutes later up she comes to my table looking all upset saying that she wanted to go to McDonalds to play that she didn’t like this place. When I asked her why she said it was “all rackety”… not sure what that meant. This was a place she had never been to before. She wanted to go … I calmly told her not until I finished my lunch that if she didn’t want to play that was OK just eat and we would know not to come to this one again. That we couldn’t go to McDs because we had already bought lunch here. Well that didn’t go over well. She wasn’t hungry (after being starving until we got there). She continued to stand by the table and get more upset.
    I quickly finished and we went out to the car where she started crawling over the seat and trying to rip the GPS off and kicking and hitting me from the back seat. And of course I had gotten a great parking place so everyone in that side of the restaurant had a great view… LOL. I told her that I wasn’t taking her anywhere like this so we went home. Had to pull over a few times while driving because of the hitting and pinching. She was still upset when we got home and raged for another hour or so. Had to restrain her.
    So today, we had a great day until bed time. She got really frustrated about nothing (sure there was something but have no idea what), started scratching scabs off. She went to sleep on the couch. When I woke her up to go to bed she got whiny about not being sleepy. So as I write this at 11:00 pm she is awake and going strong. I’m going to bed… will be a fun day tomorrow for her teacher.
    It is almost like a mania sometimes for her. doctors don’t think its bipolar but sometimes I am not sure. Could just be that she knows that if she stops she will crash. She has always fought sleep sometimes worse than others.
    Sorry for the vent… it is just so very frustrating to go through a week or so of great behavior and then have it fall apart. I am thankful for the good but it just makes it harder to believe that she can’t control more of this than she does. My head knows this but my heart forgets.
    Oh… HAPPY MOTHERS DAY everyone!
  2. keista

    keista New Member

    Wow! Sounds like a rough patch! Congratulations for making it through. Time for a :wine:

    Hove you charted her behavior? Kept a log of her manic days and the # hours of sleep she gets every night, etc. If you can show docs, they may have a clearer picture.
  3. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    Sounds like a rough few days. I'm sorry that it went that way. Will you alert the teacher that she may not be at her best in school?
  4. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Is she always this hyper?

    Has she changed her medication recently? Never underestimate the power of medications to make kids hyper and out of control. Unfortunately, as one who has taken so many medications, they fail as often as they help and often they make our kids even worse. The problem is, the medications are all hit or miss. There is no test to determine which medications are good for which's trial and error. I have heard nasty stuff about Straterra and she is on another antidepressant too (Lexapro). That's a lot of antidepressants!
  5. buddy

    buddy New Member

    I have had awful car rides lately, can be so nasty. One nice thing I have is a decent car and he is wrecking it along with my body when he is pinching, pulling my clothes, hitting, kicking etc. while driving. I have thought of putting in my MA waiver to have my car modified to have a plexi-glass panel put up in the back seat so he can't get to me. Or maybe I could just kennel him while we drive, LOL. Think they make one of those silence of the lambs retstraint things for car seats? I guess getting him into it might be a trick.

    Jokes aside, it is draining and I am sorry she is going through that. She has so many diagnosis that could add up to days like that I guess it makes sense but sure would be nice to just have a medication or behavior plan that would "fix" it right? Poor girl.....and poor you. (is she having a growth spurt??? grasping at straws for you)
  6. Liahona

    Liahona Guest

    Driving with an out of control kid is so scary. My heart goes out to you. Sorry I don't have any good advice. We have a huge van where everyone can be separated and if difficult child 1 gets violent I won't drive with him without a 2nd adult. He hasn't done that in a long time.
  7. bigbear11

    bigbear11 Guest

    I have heard nasty stuff about Straterra and she is on another antidepressant too (Lexapro). That's a lot of antidepressants![/QUOTE]

    She has been on Straterra since about 4 and has been the only constant for her. It has worked well and hasn't upped the anxiety. Nothing we have tried (medication wise) has made much of an impact... we always have a good week or two and then a really bad day or two. We've tried Stims, mood stabilizers, antipsychotics, etc. I think we have a true Fetal Alcohol Effects (FAE) issue and are getting her into a Fetal Alcohol Effects (FAE) clinic but not until October! This summer we are going to try to stop the Lexapro (have already d/c the Abilify) ... if they aren't making a significant improvement then why have her on them. Plus it has been such a long time since she has been medication free (not sure we will stop the Strat) that we really don't remember what "baseline" was like.

    Wish we could get into the Fetal Alcohol Effects (FAE) clinic sooner but mid Oct was the earliest.
  8. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Someone else may have already asked this, but... are you working with a therapist who has deep experience with and specializes in Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) kids? What these kids need is often counter-intuitive to most tdocs.

    That doesn't downplay the Fetal Alcohol Effects (FAE) side of things- just... in addition to?
  9. bigbear11

    bigbear11 Guest

    Insane... while I totally agree that she will have effects from being in the orphanage setting and may certainly have some mild attachment issues. She doesn't have full blown Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). That has been considered (granted not by someone who specializes in it) and ruled out. Even when I look at all the information... it just doesn't fit. She is a really sweet girl, honest, very bonded to us, very empathetic, gentle, etc.... except when she can't control her frustration and it blows into a rage.
  10. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    I'm glad you've already pursued Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD)... many haven't (or can't find the right channels...)
    Which then makes more sense to lean toward Fetal Alcohol Effects (FAE)...

    There are more forms of attachment disorders, though... it's not all Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), but a spectrum. We dealt with detachment... and had to rebuild attachment. Others have insecure attachment to deal with. We found it helpful to research insecure attachment (search that on this board and look for a post by Buddy... ) Just as things we could do, not in terms of formal therapy.
  11. bigbear11

    bigbear11 Guest

    Insane, thanks for the info. I searched and loved the information. I've bookmarked the Attach China site to look at more. I found it interesting that they had a section on PTSD in institutionalized kids... that has been mentioned before for TRex.