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Learning to let go
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<blockquote data-quote="Leana" data-source="post: 728674" data-attributes="member: 22778"><p>Again, more drama. He said he was going to check himself in to a crisis center. His ex girlfriend come over to my daughter's to take him. Said he was too tired and would go in Tom. This was yesterday. Well, he did go with his ex girlfriend to be admitted. I'm completely out of the drama as usually I'm the coordinator. My daughter has visiting privileges but my husband and I do not. I'd like to think he is trying to save me the pain,</p><p>but in his twisted reality he thinks he is hurting us. We have always been there with encouragement and support. This is somewhat difficult but I'm staying out of it. Looking at it objectively I now see the constant lying and I'm doing great attitude. It is so sad as I know that person is just a mask. He manipulates and destroys people for the sheer power of it. He is a poster child for Cluster B at its worst. He told his sister he thinks he has blackouts and can't remember events. Maybe just another lie to gain sympathy and not be accountable for his actions. Here is a man who never yelled at his mother and treated </p><p>me with such love. He hide it so well to me. The day I saw him lash out at me was so shocking and yet, what a reality check. I like to think he loves me but I'm not sure if he is capable. It is just the saddest thing to think he can't experience love. My life has changed</p><p>and I'm just learning to let go. I've been reading posts and so so many are my life. I ponder at the thoughts of what I could have done differently. My daughter tells me I was a wonderful mother, and appreciates everything. He is just mentally ill and it can't be fixed with love. There goes the Love can concur all theory. My heart goes out to all suffering on this forum. Finding peace and yourself again is a battle. It is something you just can't share or even talk about because the pain is deep. Thank you for letting me share.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Leana, post: 728674, member: 22778"] Again, more drama. He said he was going to check himself in to a crisis center. His ex girlfriend come over to my daughter's to take him. Said he was too tired and would go in Tom. This was yesterday. Well, he did go with his ex girlfriend to be admitted. I'm completely out of the drama as usually I'm the coordinator. My daughter has visiting privileges but my husband and I do not. I'd like to think he is trying to save me the pain, but in his twisted reality he thinks he is hurting us. We have always been there with encouragement and support. This is somewhat difficult but I'm staying out of it. Looking at it objectively I now see the constant lying and I'm doing great attitude. It is so sad as I know that person is just a mask. He manipulates and destroys people for the sheer power of it. He is a poster child for Cluster B at its worst. He told his sister he thinks he has blackouts and can't remember events. Maybe just another lie to gain sympathy and not be accountable for his actions. Here is a man who never yelled at his mother and treated me with such love. He hide it so well to me. The day I saw him lash out at me was so shocking and yet, what a reality check. I like to think he loves me but I'm not sure if he is capable. It is just the saddest thing to think he can't experience love. My life has changed and I'm just learning to let go. I've been reading posts and so so many are my life. I ponder at the thoughts of what I could have done differently. My daughter tells me I was a wonderful mother, and appreciates everything. He is just mentally ill and it can't be fixed with love. There goes the Love can concur all theory. My heart goes out to all suffering on this forum. Finding peace and yourself again is a battle. It is something you just can't share or even talk about because the pain is deep. Thank you for letting me share. [/QUOTE]
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