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Let me Pick Your Brains About This...
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 413849" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Well...I've already raised four kids to sixteen. My opinion only, and I may be wrong, is that if she isn't into the therapy NOTHING will work. You can try it (fill in the blanks as to what "it" is), but if she's not going to cooperate, no therapy can help her. My daughter was immune to therapy. She didn't stop using drugs (which was her main problem) until she made up her mind to stop because SHE thought they were harming her. No therapist helped her. She did use a few against us because some gave some strange advice such as "You need to trust her." Oh, sure. She stole and lied constantly, but we should trust her.</p><p></p><p>I can't imagine what any kind of rewards chart would do for a child that age. Anything we put into place was met with "I don't care. I don't need it." It was a huge stress for us...not sure it helped her. At that age in my opinion only kids will only change if they decide it's best to do so. And my daughter thought the therapists were "idiots" and played them well, but didn't listen to them. So for us it was best not to force her to go since it didn't help one bit. </p><p></p><p>You need to decide based on your individual child. Some things that have worked for us won't work for your child. It is hard for us to tell you what to do. However, my opinion is, if she is like my daughter, she will decide for herself when/if she wants to get help and cooperate or to change and she obviously isn't there yet. Therapy, with a good therapist, is only as good as the consumer who is willing to help himself/herself. Many huggggggz and good luck.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 413849, member: 1550"] Well...I've already raised four kids to sixteen. My opinion only, and I may be wrong, is that if she isn't into the therapy NOTHING will work. You can try it (fill in the blanks as to what "it" is), but if she's not going to cooperate, no therapy can help her. My daughter was immune to therapy. She didn't stop using drugs (which was her main problem) until she made up her mind to stop because SHE thought they were harming her. No therapist helped her. She did use a few against us because some gave some strange advice such as "You need to trust her." Oh, sure. She stole and lied constantly, but we should trust her. I can't imagine what any kind of rewards chart would do for a child that age. Anything we put into place was met with "I don't care. I don't need it." It was a huge stress for us...not sure it helped her. At that age in my opinion only kids will only change if they decide it's best to do so. And my daughter thought the therapists were "idiots" and played them well, but didn't listen to them. So for us it was best not to force her to go since it didn't help one bit. You need to decide based on your individual child. Some things that have worked for us won't work for your child. It is hard for us to tell you what to do. However, my opinion is, if she is like my daughter, she will decide for herself when/if she wants to get help and cooperate or to change and she obviously isn't there yet. Therapy, with a good therapist, is only as good as the consumer who is willing to help himself/herself. Many huggggggz and good luck. [/QUOTE]
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