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Let me Pick Your Brains About This...
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<blockquote data-quote="exhausted" data-source="post: 414095" data-attributes="member: 11001"><p>This is tough because the assumption is that your child is behaving the way she does because of you and your husband. There is just that disregard in the system for the fact that some kids are prewired, menatlly ill, or otherwise impaired. Its hard enough being the parent of these kids without taking the hits from every part of the system. In the end, I do go with "leave no stone unturned".</p><p> </p><p>I have 25 years as a teacher,15 of that as a special educator working with emotionally disturbed or behavior disorder kids. I have Love and Logic training,(many others as well) and taught a parenting class for 10 years for a local rehab. place. Yet I have a daughter I cannot control. She is mine biologically as well. I can honestly say I have been the best parent I could be and my husband as well. Strict,yes, unbending, no. Perfect, not- but I did my best. And yes, I have had green nosed therapists with no children give me "Super Nanny" advise for my hard-core 16 year old. Contracts and charts- please!</p><p> </p><p>But... I have learned something from them all and I love my daughter and want her to get better (functional). Hoop jumping has paid off for us. We spent a ton of money on a Residential Treatment Facility (RTF), one of the toughest and best here (our state is known for good programs), and she came out worse than ever, armed for bear. We are out of money and were at the mercy of the state. We have had to give temporary custody to the state in order to access the best treatment for her. Now... she has not committed to work the program and may never, but I am going to committ and do what ever they ask of me (including endless paperwork, and mindless meetings and classes).</p><p> </p><p>in my humble opinion-This stinks and is hard, and I am sure you are exhausted, but I would give it a try. If it fails it may be your ticket to the real help you need. Maybe you will gain access to an Residential Treatment Facility (RTF) or day treatment program?? By the way, when your child shows her real colors to the in home people-and she will-the "missing" paper work wont be needed.</p><p>Good luck and hugs, you are not alone.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="exhausted, post: 414095, member: 11001"] This is tough because the assumption is that your child is behaving the way she does because of you and your husband. There is just that disregard in the system for the fact that some kids are prewired, menatlly ill, or otherwise impaired. Its hard enough being the parent of these kids without taking the hits from every part of the system. In the end, I do go with "leave no stone unturned". I have 25 years as a teacher,15 of that as a special educator working with emotionally disturbed or behavior disorder kids. I have Love and Logic training,(many others as well) and taught a parenting class for 10 years for a local rehab. place. Yet I have a daughter I cannot control. She is mine biologically as well. I can honestly say I have been the best parent I could be and my husband as well. Strict,yes, unbending, no. Perfect, not- but I did my best. And yes, I have had green nosed therapists with no children give me "Super Nanny" advise for my hard-core 16 year old. Contracts and charts- please! But... I have learned something from them all and I love my daughter and want her to get better (functional). Hoop jumping has paid off for us. We spent a ton of money on a Residential Treatment Facility (RTF), one of the toughest and best here (our state is known for good programs), and she came out worse than ever, armed for bear. We are out of money and were at the mercy of the state. We have had to give temporary custody to the state in order to access the best treatment for her. Now... she has not committed to work the program and may never, but I am going to committ and do what ever they ask of me (including endless paperwork, and mindless meetings and classes). in my humble opinion-This stinks and is hard, and I am sure you are exhausted, but I would give it a try. If it fails it may be your ticket to the real help you need. Maybe you will gain access to an Residential Treatment Facility (RTF) or day treatment program?? By the way, when your child shows her real colors to the in home people-and she will-the "missing" paper work wont be needed. Good luck and hugs, you are not alone. [/QUOTE]
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