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The Watercooler
life without the ex.......
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 417981" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>gotta say i wonder how much of all of this is due to this past year and two hospitalizations almost back to back with difficult child and me gone most of the time the fall out? wonder if it's typical aftermath sort of thing in a situation similar to or like this.....</p><p></p><p></p><p>Excellent questions to write down in your journal and carry with and ask your therapist. Also ask him how long he thinks typically it takes for anyone to open up and begin to start open a line of trust and communication with a therapist they just started seeing. These are all excellent questions, but based on your relationship and it's intracacies and intamacies? It would be impossible for anyone but you, husband and your therapist to know without your background completely and history. I can tell you it takes a LONG time, and a LOT of work on both parts. BUT - if only one part of a couple is willing to work on a marriage - eventually what happens is one part of two makes good informed decisions for themselves, and their children based on knowledge gained in therapy. THAT is why you keep going, and going and give it time. Not just a month or two or a year - TIME. You and husband didn't get this way over night, you aren't going to get fixed in a few sessions. There aren't any shortcuts - gently remind him of that when he seems frustrated with it all. </p><p> </p><p>Hugs and hang in there.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 417981, member: 4964"] gotta say i wonder how much of all of this is due to this past year and two hospitalizations almost back to back with difficult child and me gone most of the time the fall out? wonder if it's typical aftermath sort of thing in a situation similar to or like this..... Excellent questions to write down in your journal and carry with and ask your therapist. Also ask him how long he thinks typically it takes for anyone to open up and begin to start open a line of trust and communication with a therapist they just started seeing. These are all excellent questions, but based on your relationship and it's intracacies and intamacies? It would be impossible for anyone but you, husband and your therapist to know without your background completely and history. I can tell you it takes a LONG time, and a LOT of work on both parts. BUT - if only one part of a couple is willing to work on a marriage - eventually what happens is one part of two makes good informed decisions for themselves, and their children based on knowledge gained in therapy. THAT is why you keep going, and going and give it time. Not just a month or two or a year - TIME. You and husband didn't get this way over night, you aren't going to get fixed in a few sessions. There aren't any shortcuts - gently remind him of that when he seems frustrated with it all. Hugs and hang in there. [/QUOTE]
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