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General Parenting
Living with Tennage Daughter diagnosis with Borderline (BPD)
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<blockquote data-quote="Giulia" data-source="post: 527812" data-attributes="member: 14306"><p>LB, I don't think that they are unrealistic. Other difficult child parents give the same kind of advice as I give myself. </p><p>Anyway, even if you are a parent yourself, every parent has a different story, so what works for one may not work for another. Parent or non parent, it makes no difference. </p><p>As I understand, if it comes from a parent who gives the exact same advice as I give, it is an "appreciated support" whereas when it comes from a non parent, it is an unrealistic piece of advice ? Isn't there a problem somewhere ?</p><p>Honestly, parent or non parent, the problem is the same : if another parent or a non parent gives you an advice which is... unrealistic or over enthusiastic, you leave it. If it suits your needs, you follow it. You take what it is helpful and you leave the rest, parent or non parent. </p><p>Considering any other support as "useless" because "they have no experience of it" is just a real pity for yourself, but also from your difficult child. </p><p>If you think that the only interesting help comes from parents, because difficult children are too "over enthusiastic", "unrealistic", as well as "out of reality", it's your choice. Not mine. </p><p>But it's a shame that the only "interesting help" has to come only from other parents because "insight from a difficult child is over enthusiastic and unrealistic". It closes many perspectives to help yourself and your difficult child, and this is a real pity.</p><p>What do you fear of losing if you hear a different perspective than a parent perspective ? </p><p></p><p>I will never say that parenting is easy, neither taking care of children. I am not God who has to distribute the good points and the bad points, basing on the "deserving". </p><p>There is no reason to put antagonism with the inputs. I repeat myself, but opposing the different inputs, parents/difficult child is a waste of time for... nothing, because it does not help anyone.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Giulia, post: 527812, member: 14306"] LB, I don't think that they are unrealistic. Other difficult child parents give the same kind of advice as I give myself. Anyway, even if you are a parent yourself, every parent has a different story, so what works for one may not work for another. Parent or non parent, it makes no difference. As I understand, if it comes from a parent who gives the exact same advice as I give, it is an "appreciated support" whereas when it comes from a non parent, it is an unrealistic piece of advice ? Isn't there a problem somewhere ? Honestly, parent or non parent, the problem is the same : if another parent or a non parent gives you an advice which is... unrealistic or over enthusiastic, you leave it. If it suits your needs, you follow it. You take what it is helpful and you leave the rest, parent or non parent. Considering any other support as "useless" because "they have no experience of it" is just a real pity for yourself, but also from your difficult child. If you think that the only interesting help comes from parents, because difficult children are too "over enthusiastic", "unrealistic", as well as "out of reality", it's your choice. Not mine. But it's a shame that the only "interesting help" has to come only from other parents because "insight from a difficult child is over enthusiastic and unrealistic". It closes many perspectives to help yourself and your difficult child, and this is a real pity. What do you fear of losing if you hear a different perspective than a parent perspective ? I will never say that parenting is easy, neither taking care of children. I am not God who has to distribute the good points and the bad points, basing on the "deserving". There is no reason to put antagonism with the inputs. I repeat myself, but opposing the different inputs, parents/difficult child is a waste of time for... nothing, because it does not help anyone. [/QUOTE]
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