Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
Looking for advice (warning: sensitive matter, not going to be for everyone)
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="AnnieO" data-source="post: 281373" data-attributes="member: 6705"><p>Mattsmom - I hope you got some quality sleep last night!</p><p> </p><p>I kind of agree with busywend on this - that if they are willing to let this continue to happen, they are themselves toxic. "All that is required for evil to prevail is for good men to do nothing." (Edmund Burke) However, if the rest of the relationship is good, and given the pain this has caused, I also agree that having the family is a wonderful thing.</p><p> </p><p><span style="font-size: 9px">(Speaking of Edmund Burke, I wonder if he was a victim or close to someone who was - he also said, "An event has happened, upon which it is difficult to speak, and impossible to be silent.")</span></p><p> </p><p>However, reading the comments and information presented by everyone is helping me - because of course I am still dealing with the anger that difficult child 1 holds against the creep. She's better at not taking it out on those who do not deserve it. But she's still hurting. And I am trying to be there for her. I cannot imagine the pain. But I know from the family point of view, how it feels for us to be so powerless to stop it, and even though it is over for difficult child 1, she relives it in her mind. In February, we repainted her bedroom and the hallucinations and flashbacks got a lot better - because she no longer sees <em>him</em> in there. It's her safe spot now. The only place she feels better is when we curl up on my bed and talk - and strangely enough, she feels the same with husband! Because she knows he won't hurt her. She knows he believes her.</p><p> </p><p>Do you have a safe spot, someone to talk to like that? Someone <em>close</em>? I know when I am really, really upset about something, I have husband - and my Mom.</p><p> </p><p>So I guess I have to say thank you for bringing this up. because maybe I will say something that helps you - but you are (all) also helping me. Reciprocity is a beautiful thing!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AnnieO, post: 281373, member: 6705"] Mattsmom - I hope you got some quality sleep last night! I kind of agree with busywend on this - that if they are willing to let this continue to happen, they are themselves toxic. "All that is required for evil to prevail is for good men to do nothing." (Edmund Burke) However, if the rest of the relationship is good, and given the pain this has caused, I also agree that having the family is a wonderful thing. [SIZE=1](Speaking of Edmund Burke, I wonder if he was a victim or close to someone who was - he also said, "An event has happened, upon which it is difficult to speak, and impossible to be silent.")[/SIZE] However, reading the comments and information presented by everyone is helping me - because of course I am still dealing with the anger that difficult child 1 holds against the creep. She's better at not taking it out on those who do not deserve it. But she's still hurting. And I am trying to be there for her. I cannot imagine the pain. But I know from the family point of view, how it feels for us to be so powerless to stop it, and even though it is over for difficult child 1, she relives it in her mind. In February, we repainted her bedroom and the hallucinations and flashbacks got a lot better - because she no longer sees [I]him[/I] in there. It's her safe spot now. The only place she feels better is when we curl up on my bed and talk - and strangely enough, she feels the same with husband! Because she knows he won't hurt her. She knows he believes her. Do you have a safe spot, someone to talk to like that? Someone [I]close[/I]? I know when I am really, really upset about something, I have husband - and my Mom. So I guess I have to say thank you for bringing this up. because maybe I will say something that helps you - but you are (all) also helping me. Reciprocity is a beautiful thing! [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
Looking for advice (warning: sensitive matter, not going to be for everyone)
Top