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The Watercooler
Looking for advice (warning: sensitive matter, not going to be for everyone)
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 281646" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>For those of you critical of people NOT wanting to come forward - please be compassionate. If someone is feeling too fragile to do this, then it would be better that they do not try, rather than try and collapse emotionally and as a result the case having to be thrown out. For the case to collapse could prejudice any future attempts. </p><p></p><p>Nobody can know unless they were going through it themselves, exactly the same experience. Even siblings or other victims of the same perpetrator cannot have the same experience in common. Person A might come through well, peron B might be a total amnesiac cot case. THis is about abuse and control, it goes way beyond mere sex. The damage these creeps can do, goes so very deep that it can be damaging just trying to rescue the memories.</p><p></p><p>PTSD happens because during the trauma, the mind simply finds ways to shut off te pain, allowing it to surface later when you are (hopefully) in better condition to handle it. If you can't handle it, hopefully your mind will find ways to help (usually by burying it all again). How we recover, each of us, is very individual.</p><p></p><p>Matt'smom, you have some great support in place. I hope others will come forward and join the campaign. But if they can't, then I hope you have some positive experiences from your new contacts with other family members.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 281646, member: 1991"] For those of you critical of people NOT wanting to come forward - please be compassionate. If someone is feeling too fragile to do this, then it would be better that they do not try, rather than try and collapse emotionally and as a result the case having to be thrown out. For the case to collapse could prejudice any future attempts. Nobody can know unless they were going through it themselves, exactly the same experience. Even siblings or other victims of the same perpetrator cannot have the same experience in common. Person A might come through well, peron B might be a total amnesiac cot case. THis is about abuse and control, it goes way beyond mere sex. The damage these creeps can do, goes so very deep that it can be damaging just trying to rescue the memories. PTSD happens because during the trauma, the mind simply finds ways to shut off te pain, allowing it to surface later when you are (hopefully) in better condition to handle it. If you can't handle it, hopefully your mind will find ways to help (usually by burying it all again). How we recover, each of us, is very individual. Matt'smom, you have some great support in place. I hope others will come forward and join the campaign. But if they can't, then I hope you have some positive experiences from your new contacts with other family members. Marg [/QUOTE]
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