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Lost my daughter for good I fear
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<blockquote data-quote="helpangel" data-source="post: 529202" data-attributes="member: 7170"><p>Dotty it sounds like you acknowledge some mistakes you made with your daughter and regret is tearing you up inside. All parents make mistakes (as my son often reminds me), see my son kind of resents that he got the control freek mom who was trying to control him and participate in his life. The 2 girls - I was more relaxed, didn't spank or give them as many chores. But I also didn't buy them a video game when they were 4yo or let them start a knife collection when they were 6yo, my son had a lot more freedom then the girls.</p><p></p><p>It wasn't that I loved him more or less then the girls just different because he was different. He was the first so of course I made more mistakes with him, he was a boy so I was training him to be a man. I noticed the more I tried to interact with him the more time he would spend away. He didn't want me to be his friend, he just wanted his dinner and to be left alone. It wasn't until he was around 25yo did he start coming in and watching tv with me or just talk.</p><p></p><p>Now Angel is headed into that "needs space" stage and its hard because she isn't as prepared to take care of herself as my son, since he was about 12yo my son could take care of himself. It's really hard stepping back and letting her find her independence because of her illness I know if she misses even one dose of her medications could spell disaster.</p><p></p><p>I wish I had the magic answers for you the only thing I can think of is try to focus on your husband and other kids, they talk to your daughter if the whole family is functioning better I think they will share that with her. I guess what I'm saying is while daughter is out stretching her wings maybe work on making home a happier place that she might like to visit.</p><p></p><p>All families are different it took me moving out before my mom & I got along but I truly didn't appreciate her until I became a mother myself. I hope you are able to find a little peace in your life.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="helpangel, post: 529202, member: 7170"] Dotty it sounds like you acknowledge some mistakes you made with your daughter and regret is tearing you up inside. All parents make mistakes (as my son often reminds me), see my son kind of resents that he got the control freek mom who was trying to control him and participate in his life. The 2 girls - I was more relaxed, didn't spank or give them as many chores. But I also didn't buy them a video game when they were 4yo or let them start a knife collection when they were 6yo, my son had a lot more freedom then the girls. It wasn't that I loved him more or less then the girls just different because he was different. He was the first so of course I made more mistakes with him, he was a boy so I was training him to be a man. I noticed the more I tried to interact with him the more time he would spend away. He didn't want me to be his friend, he just wanted his dinner and to be left alone. It wasn't until he was around 25yo did he start coming in and watching tv with me or just talk. Now Angel is headed into that "needs space" stage and its hard because she isn't as prepared to take care of herself as my son, since he was about 12yo my son could take care of himself. It's really hard stepping back and letting her find her independence because of her illness I know if she misses even one dose of her medications could spell disaster. I wish I had the magic answers for you the only thing I can think of is try to focus on your husband and other kids, they talk to your daughter if the whole family is functioning better I think they will share that with her. I guess what I'm saying is while daughter is out stretching her wings maybe work on making home a happier place that she might like to visit. All families are different it took me moving out before my mom & I got along but I truly didn't appreciate her until I became a mother myself. I hope you are able to find a little peace in your life. [/QUOTE]
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