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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 298098" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>I think that you need to get her out of your home. It doesn't sound like any of you are safe. PLEASE get alarms to put on your kids' bedroom doors and windows and on her door and windows. This way you may get some warning if she is trying to get to one of the kids at night. Whichever kids don't sleep with you, that is. It can also help you know if she is sneaking out. You can get some inexpensive alarms online or at walmart or radio shack. </p><p></p><p>Call the police tomorrow or monday to see what your rights are when she turns 18. You may have to give her 30 days notice, you may be able to make her leave earlier. I believe it is New York that a parent cannot put a child out of the home until age 21. Tehy can insist on whatever rules tehy want, and that can help get a child out, but you cannot outright kick them out at 18. It is very important to start getting answers now so that you can get whatever you need into place. You owe it to your other kids to keep them safe from her.</p><p></p><p>You may want to call the Dept of Human Services to see if they have transitional living programs for 18yos or any other services that are available. Find out what, where to apply and give difficult child a list. Don't make appts for her, it is her job.</p><p></p><p>Make SURE she is not alone with your husband. Girls this age, esp if they think they will be tossed out, can make vicious sexual abuse allegations. NOT that I am accusing your husband - FAR from it. It is a horrible accusation that girls can use as revenge. Once the accusation is out there your husband will never recover. He will have a reputation that is damaged almost beyond repair. Be very very careful to make sure he is protected from her. I have known very good men who would never ever have done anything like that who lost careers and almost every thing he ever had. One man's wife had to get a divorce to keep their children at home! It was not one of their kids, or even a friend of one of teh kids, it was a student, and it almost cost them custody of their kids.</p><p></p><p>Hugs.</p><p></p><p>Sending lots of hugs, I know this is hard.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 298098, member: 1233"] I think that you need to get her out of your home. It doesn't sound like any of you are safe. PLEASE get alarms to put on your kids' bedroom doors and windows and on her door and windows. This way you may get some warning if she is trying to get to one of the kids at night. Whichever kids don't sleep with you, that is. It can also help you know if she is sneaking out. You can get some inexpensive alarms online or at walmart or radio shack. Call the police tomorrow or monday to see what your rights are when she turns 18. You may have to give her 30 days notice, you may be able to make her leave earlier. I believe it is New York that a parent cannot put a child out of the home until age 21. Tehy can insist on whatever rules tehy want, and that can help get a child out, but you cannot outright kick them out at 18. It is very important to start getting answers now so that you can get whatever you need into place. You owe it to your other kids to keep them safe from her. You may want to call the Dept of Human Services to see if they have transitional living programs for 18yos or any other services that are available. Find out what, where to apply and give difficult child a list. Don't make appts for her, it is her job. Make SURE she is not alone with your husband. Girls this age, esp if they think they will be tossed out, can make vicious sexual abuse allegations. NOT that I am accusing your husband - FAR from it. It is a horrible accusation that girls can use as revenge. Once the accusation is out there your husband will never recover. He will have a reputation that is damaged almost beyond repair. Be very very careful to make sure he is protected from her. I have known very good men who would never ever have done anything like that who lost careers and almost every thing he ever had. One man's wife had to get a divorce to keep their children at home! It was not one of their kids, or even a friend of one of teh kids, it was a student, and it almost cost them custody of their kids. Hugs. Sending lots of hugs, I know this is hard. [/QUOTE]
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