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Manipulation or just clueless??
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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 375391" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>It seems a few are relating more to bein the parent of a difficult child in this situation which might be a typical response however my mother has been one of the biggest difficult child's in this family. She has a pattern of being emotionally distant unless she's trying to get something from a person and then she'll lie, cry, or do whatever it takes to get them to do what she wants. If she wants to manipulate a person for a different reason, she contacts them saying she's in a panic because of A, B, C, until she gets that person worried to death and all kinds of koi gets started up- and I'm not talking about just gossip- I'm talking about really effecting peoples' lives in a serious way. Then she gets defensive if that person gets mad at her so the distancing starts again and she leaves it with "I said I'm sorry that's all I can do; you're responsible for your own life" and the person is left to pick up the pieces from her koi. She has had this pattern all her life. Just like when she instigated my bro into filing for custody- oops, she's sorry- and I'm out thousands of dollars. Same with bring her bro to our house when she had been warned about it. Oops sorry- you're still responsible. Well, when is SHE responsible for what she starts or contributes to? I'm just done.</p><p></p><p>Any of us could send a ssimilar message to our kids under certain circumstances- I wasn't trying to say there was something outrageous about her message in itself, it was that it did not accurately respond to the circumstances but that is exactly how she keeps the rest of the world believing that she must be the good mother and I'm the whacko.</p><p></p><p>I've got too many other things to do- I'm going to drop the issue now.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 375391, member: 3699"] It seems a few are relating more to bein the parent of a difficult child in this situation which might be a typical response however my mother has been one of the biggest difficult child's in this family. She has a pattern of being emotionally distant unless she's trying to get something from a person and then she'll lie, cry, or do whatever it takes to get them to do what she wants. If she wants to manipulate a person for a different reason, she contacts them saying she's in a panic because of A, B, C, until she gets that person worried to death and all kinds of koi gets started up- and I'm not talking about just gossip- I'm talking about really effecting peoples' lives in a serious way. Then she gets defensive if that person gets mad at her so the distancing starts again and she leaves it with "I said I'm sorry that's all I can do; you're responsible for your own life" and the person is left to pick up the pieces from her koi. She has had this pattern all her life. Just like when she instigated my bro into filing for custody- oops, she's sorry- and I'm out thousands of dollars. Same with bring her bro to our house when she had been warned about it. Oops sorry- you're still responsible. Well, when is SHE responsible for what she starts or contributes to? I'm just done. Any of us could send a ssimilar message to our kids under certain circumstances- I wasn't trying to say there was something outrageous about her message in itself, it was that it did not accurately respond to the circumstances but that is exactly how she keeps the rest of the world believing that she must be the good mother and I'm the whacko. I've got too many other things to do- I'm going to drop the issue now. [/QUOTE]
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Manipulation or just clueless??
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