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Marine update #3
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 723874" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I only had a few episodes of mania and they were not full mania. I felt great but did not run out and have sex in bars, which is common with full mania, nor did I buy things galore, another symptom.</p><p></p><p>But I felt glorious. I wanted to feel that middling high forever. I totally get the lure of the high. It's drugs without drugs.</p><p></p><p>But in the end, I wanted to be normal and medications control the torture of severe depression. But mood stabilizers are not for me. I want to feel normal, not like an emotionless zombie. That isnt normal. Thats feeling drugged, just as if one were taking street drugs. There can be hideous side effects too.</p><p></p><p>I wont ever take a mood stabilizer. When I was 23 and spent ten weeks in a very good univesity psychiatric hospital, they gave me Thorazine to see if it helped me. It made me dull and foggy and even more depressed. I declined more. Nowadays they have Risperdal, Zyprexa, etc. But I wouldnt take them either. I like not being depressed, but I like to be myself too. I actually like me. Any drug that takes away my ability to be me is not happening.</p><p>It is individual to all, but I believe it when people say certain medications make them zombies and I dont blame anyone for rejecting medications that wipe out their personalities. It takes time to find helpful medications that dont zombie you out.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 723874, member: 1550"] I only had a few episodes of mania and they were not full mania. I felt great but did not run out and have sex in bars, which is common with full mania, nor did I buy things galore, another symptom. But I felt glorious. I wanted to feel that middling high forever. I totally get the lure of the high. It's drugs without drugs. But in the end, I wanted to be normal and medications control the torture of severe depression. But mood stabilizers are not for me. I want to feel normal, not like an emotionless zombie. That isnt normal. Thats feeling drugged, just as if one were taking street drugs. There can be hideous side effects too. I wont ever take a mood stabilizer. When I was 23 and spent ten weeks in a very good univesity psychiatric hospital, they gave me Thorazine to see if it helped me. It made me dull and foggy and even more depressed. I declined more. Nowadays they have Risperdal, Zyprexa, etc. But I wouldnt take them either. I like not being depressed, but I like to be myself too. I actually like me. Any drug that takes away my ability to be me is not happening. It is individual to all, but I believe it when people say certain medications make them zombies and I dont blame anyone for rejecting medications that wipe out their personalities. It takes time to find helpful medications that dont zombie you out. [/QUOTE]
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