Oh Melissa, how awful. I'm sure the DSS people have seen it all, but to treat recipients as though they are the scum of the earth is just horrible! The more I think about it, the madder I get.
Maybe if you make some phone calls or send some emails, you can find someone who actually cares. I would definitely try going over her head, if that's possible.
Hope she's not pregnant...etopic can be dangerous---I think she'd have to have emergency surgery if that's the case.