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Substance Abuse
"Mom, I can't drive home right now..."
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 104359" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I'm with Meow. No option of staying overnight (I would have called her a cab so I didn't have to go out and she would have cleaned the house to pay me back the fare). No car. She may have paid for it, but she can't drive it without insurance and I would not help her get any AT ALL. I'd drive her, and only her, to get a job, in which she can use public transportation, a bike, or her own two feet to get there. Being soft on kids who are lazy and apathetic due to drug and alcohol use/abuse DOES NOT WORK. In fact, they like it because it enables their nonproductive lifestyle. She must have been pretty wasted to actually call you and that IS preferable to NOT calling you, but I don't see that this makes her capable of making good choices with a vehicle. Pot stays in the system a long time and, from long experience, I have learned that "I use pot" usually means "I use more than pot, but you won't blow up at me if I just say I use pot." I didn't find out until after my daughter cleaned up that she had used every drug under the sun, including a few tries of heroin, crack cocaine, and ecstacy. She ended up getting into three car accidents, however two of them were after she was tossed out of the house. Years later, after she had cleaned up her act, she was sued for $14,000 from one woman who claimed a late injury. She ended up having to dish out $7000. Her father paid it, but she has to pay him back each month, even though she's totally straight now. I don't think "the benefit of the doubt" works with these kids. I do not believe trying not to "hurt" their sensitive feelings works either. As my daughter says "Never trust a drug addict." They "play" you and do all they can to justify their drifter type lifestyle. I believe in hardball as it's the only thing they understand. If you don't cut off her driving, she may get into a horrible accident like my daughter did (actually it was three). Monkeyboy would not even be a factor--he'd be banned from the house and she'd be banned from driving to see him. We had a "Dice" (scary dude) who we didn't allow in our house. Later on, he was arrested for burglary and drugs. I suggest Tough Love. Good luck :smile:</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 104359, member: 1550"] I'm with Meow. No option of staying overnight (I would have called her a cab so I didn't have to go out and she would have cleaned the house to pay me back the fare). No car. She may have paid for it, but she can't drive it without insurance and I would not help her get any AT ALL. I'd drive her, and only her, to get a job, in which she can use public transportation, a bike, or her own two feet to get there. Being soft on kids who are lazy and apathetic due to drug and alcohol use/abuse DOES NOT WORK. In fact, they like it because it enables their nonproductive lifestyle. She must have been pretty wasted to actually call you and that IS preferable to NOT calling you, but I don't see that this makes her capable of making good choices with a vehicle. Pot stays in the system a long time and, from long experience, I have learned that "I use pot" usually means "I use more than pot, but you won't blow up at me if I just say I use pot." I didn't find out until after my daughter cleaned up that she had used every drug under the sun, including a few tries of heroin, crack cocaine, and ecstacy. She ended up getting into three car accidents, however two of them were after she was tossed out of the house. Years later, after she had cleaned up her act, she was sued for $14,000 from one woman who claimed a late injury. She ended up having to dish out $7000. Her father paid it, but she has to pay him back each month, even though she's totally straight now. I don't think "the benefit of the doubt" works with these kids. I do not believe trying not to "hurt" their sensitive feelings works either. As my daughter says "Never trust a drug addict." They "play" you and do all they can to justify their drifter type lifestyle. I believe in hardball as it's the only thing they understand. If you don't cut off her driving, she may get into a horrible accident like my daughter did (actually it was three). Monkeyboy would not even be a factor--he'd be banned from the house and she'd be banned from driving to see him. We had a "Dice" (scary dude) who we didn't allow in our house. Later on, he was arrested for burglary and drugs. I suggest Tough Love. Good luck [img]:smile:[/img] [/QUOTE]
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"Mom, I can't drive home right now..."
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