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Mom needs help with detaching from son
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 634804" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Luane, to get a bigger response, you may want to start a new thread. This one is awfully old.</p><p></p><p>Luane, your son will not get heat stroke. He knows that malls and the library have air conditioning. He probably knows where the water is to catch a breeze and to jump in. You know he is using drugs, which is why his eyes are red. If he almost got into an accident, which is questionable, it could be due to drug use. Actually certain drugs stop you from being able to sleep. My daughter seemed to never sleep when she was doing uppers and meth, although, at the time, I did not know that this was why. She sometimes slept all day because she took barbituates to let her sleep and night was more fun to be awake than day. She also worked, but spent all her extra money on drugs. </p><p></p><p>He did not take you up on the rental assistance/sober house because he doesn't want to quit using whatever he's using. He'd rather be homeless and high. When he is ready, he will come to you sincerely looking for help or he will get it himself and shock you, which is what happened to us. Nobody on drugs makes good decisions and it is hard for us to see. I know first hand. But drugs also cause our beloved adult children to steal from us, abuse us, sometimes even physically assault us. They are impossible to live with and they won't accept help. </p><p></p><p>I just wanted to tell you that I hear you and wish things were different and hope they do change in the future. Also, wanted to remind you that your son is NOT stupid. He's a drug user, but he knows, as all people on the street do, where the air conditioning is, where the food is, where the shelter is, where the help is...and he is probably cool most of the time, even in this heatwave. Our difficult children know how to tug at the heartstrings and make us believe that they are too helpless to take care of themselves, but they take care of themselves in their own ways and we can't help them if they don't want to be helped.</p><p></p><p>Hugs tonight and I hope you can find some peace.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 634804, member: 1550"] Luane, to get a bigger response, you may want to start a new thread. This one is awfully old. Luane, your son will not get heat stroke. He knows that malls and the library have air conditioning. He probably knows where the water is to catch a breeze and to jump in. You know he is using drugs, which is why his eyes are red. If he almost got into an accident, which is questionable, it could be due to drug use. Actually certain drugs stop you from being able to sleep. My daughter seemed to never sleep when she was doing uppers and meth, although, at the time, I did not know that this was why. She sometimes slept all day because she took barbituates to let her sleep and night was more fun to be awake than day. She also worked, but spent all her extra money on drugs. He did not take you up on the rental assistance/sober house because he doesn't want to quit using whatever he's using. He'd rather be homeless and high. When he is ready, he will come to you sincerely looking for help or he will get it himself and shock you, which is what happened to us. Nobody on drugs makes good decisions and it is hard for us to see. I know first hand. But drugs also cause our beloved adult children to steal from us, abuse us, sometimes even physically assault us. They are impossible to live with and they won't accept help. I just wanted to tell you that I hear you and wish things were different and hope they do change in the future. Also, wanted to remind you that your son is NOT stupid. He's a drug user, but he knows, as all people on the street do, where the air conditioning is, where the food is, where the shelter is, where the help is...and he is probably cool most of the time, even in this heatwave. Our difficult children know how to tug at the heartstrings and make us believe that they are too helpless to take care of themselves, but they take care of themselves in their own ways and we can't help them if they don't want to be helped. Hugs tonight and I hope you can find some peace. [/QUOTE]
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