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Substance Abuse
Most difficult years of my life
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<blockquote data-quote="Littleboylost" data-source="post: 725969" data-attributes="member: 21895"><p>GS </p><p>I feel your worry and pain I truly do. I too can not warwpcmy head around why my son lives the way he does. Chooses the life he does. </p><p></p><p>Naranon and this forum have given me so much strength to detach from my son and not be so overwhelmed with Fear, Obligation and Guilt. </p><p></p><p>My son a few years ago when he ramped up his drug use also pawned jewelry. We know he did because every time we ask him about it he says “I didn’t pawn it someone stole it”. Which of course we know means he pawned all of it. 2 gold chains and a bracelet. One that was his and the chain and bracelet that belonged to me. My husband bought them for me when we were married. </p><p></p><p>Perhaps if you know what shop he wound pawn it at you could go and explain the situation to the shop and purchase the item when he isn’t able to retrieve it. That way you can at least secure the family heirloom and put it away for safe keeping. </p><p></p><p>Drugs make them do and say the most terrible things. All be it that it is their drug brain speaking it is our normal selves who have to put up with this insult and injury. At times distance may well be best. </p><p></p><p>A good thing I learned in Naranon is Nothing changes if nothing changes. I learned to ask myself what would happen if I continued to support my son and do things for and with him. Well what happened was he ramped up his drug use and found ways to steal from us that I could have never imagined he would do. </p><p></p><p>We had him arrested (for the second time), and he sat in jail for 10 days. He is still in the blame the world mode not taking accountability for his actions at all. He was released on the agreeemnt that he go to a long term inpatient rehab program. We are waiting for a bed. </p><p></p><p>He remains arrogant and cockey is smoking pot and drinking (not around us), has chosen to hole up at his GFs house which I find shameful. I could never have behaved the way he did when I was his age. </p><p></p><p>His choices and actions have him where he is in life. If he does not complete rehab he will face his charges and go back to prison. We will not accept him home to live if this is the path he chooses. </p><p></p><p>These are such difficult decisions to make. At 18,going on 19 he has to take accountability for his life and it is what he makes it. </p><p></p><p>I Hioe you find some help and peace of mind with Naranon. None of us deserve what our children put us through. We have the right to set boudaries and expectations and lead peaceful lives.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Littleboylost, post: 725969, member: 21895"] GS I feel your worry and pain I truly do. I too can not warwpcmy head around why my son lives the way he does. Chooses the life he does. Naranon and this forum have given me so much strength to detach from my son and not be so overwhelmed with Fear, Obligation and Guilt. My son a few years ago when he ramped up his drug use also pawned jewelry. We know he did because every time we ask him about it he says “I didn’t pawn it someone stole it”. Which of course we know means he pawned all of it. 2 gold chains and a bracelet. One that was his and the chain and bracelet that belonged to me. My husband bought them for me when we were married. Perhaps if you know what shop he wound pawn it at you could go and explain the situation to the shop and purchase the item when he isn’t able to retrieve it. That way you can at least secure the family heirloom and put it away for safe keeping. Drugs make them do and say the most terrible things. All be it that it is their drug brain speaking it is our normal selves who have to put up with this insult and injury. At times distance may well be best. A good thing I learned in Naranon is Nothing changes if nothing changes. I learned to ask myself what would happen if I continued to support my son and do things for and with him. Well what happened was he ramped up his drug use and found ways to steal from us that I could have never imagined he would do. We had him arrested (for the second time), and he sat in jail for 10 days. He is still in the blame the world mode not taking accountability for his actions at all. He was released on the agreeemnt that he go to a long term inpatient rehab program. We are waiting for a bed. He remains arrogant and cockey is smoking pot and drinking (not around us), has chosen to hole up at his GFs house which I find shameful. I could never have behaved the way he did when I was his age. His choices and actions have him where he is in life. If he does not complete rehab he will face his charges and go back to prison. We will not accept him home to live if this is the path he chooses. These are such difficult decisions to make. At 18,going on 19 he has to take accountability for his life and it is what he makes it. I Hioe you find some help and peace of mind with Naranon. None of us deserve what our children put us through. We have the right to set boudaries and expectations and lead peaceful lives. [/QUOTE]
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