My "Firstborn" Turns 15 Today... Miraculously...

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by gcvmom, Sep 6, 2009.

  1. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    because between his dad and I, we were ready to strangle him a few hours ago!

    He and difficult child 2 were in the kitchen -- difficult child 2's cutting a bagel to eat before bed, and he's in there looking for a snack, too. So the fact that they were both hungry was strike #1.

    difficult child 2 accidentally loses the bagel and it lands in the soapy dishwater. So he starts to stuff it down the disposal (can't say I blame him -- who'd want to eat a soggy, soapy bagel?) Strike #2.

    difficult child 1 immediately starts scolding him for "wasting food" and smacks him in the head. Strike #3:clubbing:

    difficult child 2 still has the bread knife in his hand, raises it and tells difficult child 1 not to touch him again or he'll kill him. Game Over. :holymoly:

    difficult child 1 grabs difficult child 2's hand and squeezes hard to get him to drop the knife, while kneeing him hard in the thigh. difficult child 2 goes down on the floor and is crying and holding his leg as I come in from the garage where I was happily folding laundry until my reverie was broken by the sound of screaming and snarling and the brotherly brawl that was taking place in the kitchen. :faint:

    I managed to get the above story after reading them both the riot act, then questioning them separately, then together, and then separately again. They got sent to their rooms while I fumed and went upstairs to consult husband on what to do about it.

    His solution? They had to go out to the yard and run sprints until husband decided they could stop (about 10 minutes). Then he had them do pushups, situps, and then more sprints. Then more situps and pushups. Then a few more sprints. Then they got a lecture. :soapbox: Then they were asked if they had anything to say for themselves. After they both acknowledged their part in the melee (difficult child 1 for provoking his brother in the first place and battering him, difficult child 2 for the assault with the knife), they were sent to bed (and still hungry, no less).

    I am finding it very hard to summon up the enthusiasm I had for difficult child 1's birthday now, as I'm sure you all can appreciate.
  2. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    It never ends, does it? Sending hugs and lots of peaceful quiet...hope you have a pleasant BD for difficult child even if you want to choke him.
  3. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    difficult child's can't hoover the joy out of any get together can't they? Doesn't take long.
    Congratulations for making it 15yrs. Hopefully you only have 5 to 10 more to go.
  4. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    LOL....actually I think your husband had a wonderful plan of action for the miscreants. He might not have realized it but he took a page right out of Doug Riley.
  5. svengandhi

    svengandhi Well-Known Member

    My middle boy turned 15 last week. He was the difficult child that brought me here and he has matured and mellowed beyond my expectations in the 10 years I have been here (I joined first when he was in K).

    However, my 10 and 13 year olds are like the Bickersons. The 13 year old just torments the crud out of his little brother even when we are sitting right there and the little guy just provokes him. Little guy calls him "fatty pants" and other names and 13 will grab him and not let him go. 13 is almost 5'7" and 180 lbs and 10 is about a foot shorter and 80 lbs lighter. We got called into school because little guy was crying to the school psychiatric about his brother and the psychiatric thought he was lying because 13 is an amazingly socialized child that others just adore and the psychiatric couldn't believe he would torment 10 because he was so good to him at school!

    So, I feel your pain and I think I will adopt your husband's tactics. Both boys could stand to lose a few pounds anyway.
  6. Josie

    Josie Active Member

    husband and I are always on edge when the 2 difficult child's are in the same room together without us, even if it sounds like they are getting along. It is just a matter of time before there is trouble.

    I hope you are able to enjoy his birthday today.
  7. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I will tell you it should get better. I wont say it always does but it most likely will.

    My boys were always at each others throats. One couldnt walk by the other one without taking a swing at the other one, trying to trip the other one or some other such offense. We couldnt travel in the car without having to endure the infamous "he's touching me, he's looking at me, he's breathing my air" routine.

    I cant tell you how many times I opened the door and tossed them outside and told them not to come back until someone was dead..or they worked out their

    I thought they would grow up hating each other and never want to have a thing to do with each other. Ha! Nothing could be farther from the truth. They are closer than peas in a pod now.

    It started when Jamie left for boot. When Cory saw him for the first time at graduation from boot, he was almost 17. He was the first one to spot Jamie in the huge crowd of Marines on the field and he started crying the whole ceremony. LOL. He got us crying. When they dismissed the Marines, he was the first one over the rope and jumping in his brothers arms. Surprised Jamie to death! He wouldnt leave Jamie's side the whole time Jamie was home.

    The boys have been there for each other through all that has happened to each of them: the good, the bad and the ugly. They call each other all the time and it is each other that they turn to. I would have never believed it but I am so thrilled.
  8. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    Well, happy birthday to difficult child 1 anyways. I hope he has a quiet and uneventful day...
  9. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Here is hoping for a pleasant day - FOR MOM AND DAD!!!

    The boys are getting the gift of life. You didn't strangle them over the brawl. I would al least MENTION that they should be dang happy to get socks and underwear (aka Christmas at the Poorhouse as my momma threatened it!) as a gift.

    Then, when you give them items that are NOT socks and undies they should be super appreciative. They SHOULD be, not that they WILL be, LOL!!!

    In my family my dad gives MY MOM a gift on my birthday. I also get gifts and now give my mom a gift then also.SHE did all the work, LOL!!

    Now that I have kids my dad gives me a gift on their bdays also.
  10. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Thanks for the understanding words :) It's so nice that you all understand what life is like with kids like these... most others I know would just shake their heads and look incredulous.

    The light of a new day is upon us and everyone is remorseful for their behavior and trying hard to do better. difficult child 1 even put his Daytrana patch on without my asking (of course, that was 20 minutes after he'd already had his Focalin) because he said he wanted to have a good day today! :faint:

    He's not getting much for his birthday this year because of our financial situation. husband and I gave him $20, and difficult child 2 and easy child gave him an Iron Man t-shirt I bought on clearance a while back and a pair of belts that were also on clearance. Our Disney passes we got last year (when we were living large on a healthy paycheck) are good today, and if I bring a copy of difficult child 1's birth certificate, they will give him either a free ticket to the park good for any time in the next year, OR a Disney gift card of equivalent value. So that's where we're going today.

    Fingers crossed they ALL behave and that this will be a fun and memorable day for difficult child 1.

    Tomorrow he starts high school!
  11. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    Say hi to Mickey for us!
  12. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    So glad to hear they are doing so much better today. Happy birthday to difficult child!