Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
My Own Man/Cleaning Problems
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 419567" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Susie, </p><p> </p><p>I'm not sure what to tell you. DF is disabled, and before that? He worked, I worked and the interesting thing was before we shared a home? Someone had to do his dishes, someone had to clean his home, someone had to do his laundry....and then I went to his house and WOW....no one did his dishes, no one cleaned his home, and I'm thinking whomever he was going out with did his laundry. IT.WAS...WOW. I still remember the story of him telling me how he got rid of the door to door religious phamplet people the day he slung open the door to his mobile home, kicked the beer cans out onto the porch and was in his underpants and said they said "We'd like to introduce you to Jesus." and DF said "Jesus was here last night - he had a great time.." and slammed the door. Actually it was a biker named Jesus - but he wasn't lying. O can see it ever so clearly - late 20's...pig sty. Not much has changed. </p><p> </p><p>Thing is - when we moved to this house? We talked about 'space' his/mine - ours. The garaged converted to a den is the man cave. I don't go in it, I don't clean it, I don't designate it, decorate it, dictate it. It even has a statue of 2 bullfrogs stuffed playing billiards, and it's covered in a wretched layer of dust. I have swept to keep the dirt from migrating into the house - but it's his space. Even his man friends are comfy there. Sometimes I think its a veritable fart-arena, scratch-fest, nasty he man place. However; it does have it's advantages. It's his. I don't have to and will not - clean. When it gets that bad? He cleans it. I've helped a couple times - but the rest of the house past that door? Is mine. AND - the deal was? If I never say "OH THIS NEEDS...." He pitches in with the kitchen, cooking, dishes, and dumps the trash and helps out in the yard. Occasionally he'll also pitch in and wash towels and fold them too. I don't ask. He also is now in charge of his own laundry. Since Dude was 15 - everyone does their own. Actually Dude has known since he was 10 - but soap powder and difficult child is toxic. </p><p> </p><p>The notion that once I came home from work - I'd cook, clean and laundry, plus do the yard? yeah well - I got to that "Oh no I don't need your help cut off my nose to spite my face thing for a while and then I though - UHG this is stupid - so I said to him - You know - You're in pain - you're not dying...you're going to BE in pain whether you sit there - or do SoMETHING - so why don't you cook, and clean up - 3 nights and I'll do it 4. Come to find out - he likes to cook. Then it got to be where he did it all the time and now if he cooks? I'll clean - or sometimes he just does it. I don't think either of us ever feel like we're taking advantage - When we do - we sit and talk. I'd never want him to feel like I was making him out to do it all - and him me. I have a partner, that's in pain - and it's frustrating, but we deal best we can, and let the rest go - </p><p> </p><p>As far as what's in between? I think your kids are old enough now to pitch in considerably, and if I couldn't motivate them? I'd find a way to delgate, with or without husband's help. If he's not on line looking for jobs? I think the mouse would suddenly stop working until the house was back in order.....Know what I mean??</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 419567, member: 4964"] Susie, I'm not sure what to tell you. DF is disabled, and before that? He worked, I worked and the interesting thing was before we shared a home? Someone had to do his dishes, someone had to clean his home, someone had to do his laundry....and then I went to his house and WOW....no one did his dishes, no one cleaned his home, and I'm thinking whomever he was going out with did his laundry. IT.WAS...WOW. I still remember the story of him telling me how he got rid of the door to door religious phamplet people the day he slung open the door to his mobile home, kicked the beer cans out onto the porch and was in his underpants and said they said "We'd like to introduce you to Jesus." and DF said "Jesus was here last night - he had a great time.." and slammed the door. Actually it was a biker named Jesus - but he wasn't lying. O can see it ever so clearly - late 20's...pig sty. Not much has changed. Thing is - when we moved to this house? We talked about 'space' his/mine - ours. The garaged converted to a den is the man cave. I don't go in it, I don't clean it, I don't designate it, decorate it, dictate it. It even has a statue of 2 bullfrogs stuffed playing billiards, and it's covered in a wretched layer of dust. I have swept to keep the dirt from migrating into the house - but it's his space. Even his man friends are comfy there. Sometimes I think its a veritable fart-arena, scratch-fest, nasty he man place. However; it does have it's advantages. It's his. I don't have to and will not - clean. When it gets that bad? He cleans it. I've helped a couple times - but the rest of the house past that door? Is mine. AND - the deal was? If I never say "OH THIS NEEDS...." He pitches in with the kitchen, cooking, dishes, and dumps the trash and helps out in the yard. Occasionally he'll also pitch in and wash towels and fold them too. I don't ask. He also is now in charge of his own laundry. Since Dude was 15 - everyone does their own. Actually Dude has known since he was 10 - but soap powder and difficult child is toxic. The notion that once I came home from work - I'd cook, clean and laundry, plus do the yard? yeah well - I got to that "Oh no I don't need your help cut off my nose to spite my face thing for a while and then I though - UHG this is stupid - so I said to him - You know - You're in pain - you're not dying...you're going to BE in pain whether you sit there - or do SoMETHING - so why don't you cook, and clean up - 3 nights and I'll do it 4. Come to find out - he likes to cook. Then it got to be where he did it all the time and now if he cooks? I'll clean - or sometimes he just does it. I don't think either of us ever feel like we're taking advantage - When we do - we sit and talk. I'd never want him to feel like I was making him out to do it all - and him me. I have a partner, that's in pain - and it's frustrating, but we deal best we can, and let the rest go - As far as what's in between? I think your kids are old enough now to pitch in considerably, and if I couldn't motivate them? I'd find a way to delgate, with or without husband's help. If he's not on line looking for jobs? I think the mouse would suddenly stop working until the house was back in order.....Know what I mean?? [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
My Own Man/Cleaning Problems
Top