Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
My serial pedophile father just confessed to me in writing
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 422309" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>MattsMom, </p><p> </p><p>The things this person has taken from you and all his other victims? Drunk or sober? There is no way he could ever give back what he took. It wasn't his to have, it isn't his to try and give back. He didn't take just (1) thing. He took thousands of things. When asked how I felt about the things my x took from me? I sat for a while and then after a long silence I said "Have you ever been to an ice pond?" There was a nod. Have you ever seen anyone step on ice that isn't quite hard, and stomp on it then watch as the ice fractures, and the lines run, and those lines run, and those lines run and on, and on, and on like a bolt of lightning in the sky? THAT is what abuse felt like to me - The abuser only considers what he did as the STOMP, but never considers the fractures he leaves in your life. Some heal, some don't. Some seem to come right back to the surface no matter how much therapy you have to forget about the trauma. But I think for all my therapy,and all my soul searching part way into my journey? The worst thing I heard was my x - leaving a voice mail (kinda like your biofather) saying to me "You should just grow up, and forget the past, it's all water under the bridge now, be a big girl." It wasn't even an apology. The things done were horrid, and like you brought wrath right to the surface. This man also hurt my son - our son. So I feel for you when you say he hurt your family. I too wish my x would stay in jail. It's not the punishment I feel he deserves, but then what is? I don't dwell on it - it's a waste of MY time - another waste of thoughts about him of MY time. That's what I guess I can pass on to you. Don't give this person any more time or rather any more of YOUR time, do just what you have to do, and make a pact with yourself that no matter how much you want to speak about him, complain about him, discuss him - unless its factual, pertinent to the case - just don't let him have that part of you. He's had enough of your life. </p><p> </p><p>I wish you all the best in making sure he goes to jail. My greatest wish is that eventually you find enough peace and serenity in your heart to forgive yourself enough to forgive him and he becomes a nothing to you. A true nothing. Because I'm sure somewhere in that? Is where you find your peace. Not that you won't get angry still, not that you won't want justice, and you won't loose your edge ever - but just that he means absolutely zero like a complete stranger. I wish that for you and anyone this person victimized so you can all move on and heal. Sounds weird, but evenutally with help it can happen. </p><p> </p><p>Hugs and love - hugely</p><p>Star</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 422309, member: 4964"] MattsMom, The things this person has taken from you and all his other victims? Drunk or sober? There is no way he could ever give back what he took. It wasn't his to have, it isn't his to try and give back. He didn't take just (1) thing. He took thousands of things. When asked how I felt about the things my x took from me? I sat for a while and then after a long silence I said "Have you ever been to an ice pond?" There was a nod. Have you ever seen anyone step on ice that isn't quite hard, and stomp on it then watch as the ice fractures, and the lines run, and those lines run, and those lines run and on, and on, and on like a bolt of lightning in the sky? THAT is what abuse felt like to me - The abuser only considers what he did as the STOMP, but never considers the fractures he leaves in your life. Some heal, some don't. Some seem to come right back to the surface no matter how much therapy you have to forget about the trauma. But I think for all my therapy,and all my soul searching part way into my journey? The worst thing I heard was my x - leaving a voice mail (kinda like your biofather) saying to me "You should just grow up, and forget the past, it's all water under the bridge now, be a big girl." It wasn't even an apology. The things done were horrid, and like you brought wrath right to the surface. This man also hurt my son - our son. So I feel for you when you say he hurt your family. I too wish my x would stay in jail. It's not the punishment I feel he deserves, but then what is? I don't dwell on it - it's a waste of MY time - another waste of thoughts about him of MY time. That's what I guess I can pass on to you. Don't give this person any more time or rather any more of YOUR time, do just what you have to do, and make a pact with yourself that no matter how much you want to speak about him, complain about him, discuss him - unless its factual, pertinent to the case - just don't let him have that part of you. He's had enough of your life. I wish you all the best in making sure he goes to jail. My greatest wish is that eventually you find enough peace and serenity in your heart to forgive yourself enough to forgive him and he becomes a nothing to you. A true nothing. Because I'm sure somewhere in that? Is where you find your peace. Not that you won't get angry still, not that you won't want justice, and you won't loose your edge ever - but just that he means absolutely zero like a complete stranger. I wish that for you and anyone this person victimized so you can all move on and heal. Sounds weird, but evenutally with help it can happen. Hugs and love - hugely Star [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
My serial pedophile father just confessed to me in writing
Top