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Parent Emeritus
My son is choosing to be homeless, I am heartbroken.
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 699976" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Trust me, I understand your pain and frustration with your son, but, being an outsider in this, my gut tells me that for the moment it is just alienating him more to send him anything...if he wants to go back to school, for example, he knows how to do it and he can get.his GED when he is in a better place. Obviously right now he is in a stubborn, self destruct mode, refusing to follow anyone's rules, and that mindset is unwilling to change until he has a personal change of heart. So I would only give him advice if he asks for it.</p><p></p><p>Like more young adults and teens than we like to admit, sounds like perhaps he, unlike his siblings, was not happy about your remarriage and maybe stepsiblings. Is this when it started? My kids were none too happy when I remarried, so hubby and I decided that he would not get involved in dlscipline....me and ex did that...and that helped. After all, he isn't the father and I picked him, my kids did not. That helped their relationship. It is 21 years later and my kids like him now.</p><p></p><p>I wish I had magic words for you. Your son is very young and could change. But since he is a legal adult, you can't force him to do snything. So detachment is helpful. Fighting with him, if you do, hurts you and stresses you out and probably doesn't make him see the light. He has to do that on his own.</p><p></p><p>Big hugs.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 699976, member: 1550"] Trust me, I understand your pain and frustration with your son, but, being an outsider in this, my gut tells me that for the moment it is just alienating him more to send him anything...if he wants to go back to school, for example, he knows how to do it and he can get.his GED when he is in a better place. Obviously right now he is in a stubborn, self destruct mode, refusing to follow anyone's rules, and that mindset is unwilling to change until he has a personal change of heart. So I would only give him advice if he asks for it. Like more young adults and teens than we like to admit, sounds like perhaps he, unlike his siblings, was not happy about your remarriage and maybe stepsiblings. Is this when it started? My kids were none too happy when I remarried, so hubby and I decided that he would not get involved in dlscipline....me and ex did that...and that helped. After all, he isn't the father and I picked him, my kids did not. That helped their relationship. It is 21 years later and my kids like him now. I wish I had magic words for you. Your son is very young and could change. But since he is a legal adult, you can't force him to do snything. So detachment is helpful. Fighting with him, if you do, hurts you and stresses you out and probably doesn't make him see the light. He has to do that on his own. Big hugs. [/QUOTE]
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My son is choosing to be homeless, I am heartbroken.
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