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Substance Abuse
My teen is dealing drugs!
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 616343" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hi there and so sorry for your hurting mommy heart. I don't know, however, that I can advise you to do nothing and not upset your daughter. in my opinion that will only encourage her to keep doing what she is doing and to end up in jail one day. Also, she is not behaving in a way that is healthy for herself or for you (and YOU matter too). Why are you afraid of her? If she leaves the house, what will make things worse for her? Isn't she already being unsafe even though you are trying to offer her comfort and support and lots of love? Anything can happen in her lifestyle even if she lives at home and it doesn't sound like she is there full time. She is eighteen and there is nothing you can do to protect her. Scary, I know! I was in the same boat once. But legally she can do what she likes and the drug lifestyle is dangerous, no matter if she lives home part time or not.</p><p></p><p>Hey...about Facebook. Aren't YOU paying for her cell phone? Then you have a right to check her Facebook, room, and cell phone whenever you like since she is living dangerously AND at home rent free. She is breaking the law. in my opinion you have every right to try to keep her safe by any means possible, including seriously invading her property. So she gets mad? Big deal. Don't YOU get mad? Does she care? Don't you deserve the same consideration?</p><p></p><p>Most of our drug involved kids need to hit rock bottom without our helping them in order to decide to change. She will not be able to make it at work if she has a record (which she is just about asking for) or if she is high on drugs (my daughter, who was an addict once, told me that if you use it you sell it...she's clean now with no reason to lie).</p><p></p><p>Can you tell us more about her story? Do you have younger kids at home? Are you getting criticism from some others who are making you feel guilty? Do you realize that this is 100% your daughter's decision and that you are guilt-free in this?</p><p></p><p>I believe it will be impossible to stop your child over the long haul from raging at you. Has she ever assaulted you or threatened to? If she has, have you ever called the police? Has she stolen from you?</p><p></p><p>I highly recommend going to Nar-Anon meetings for face time support. If you don't like Nar-Anon, find a good therapist to help you see things straight and take good care of yourself. You can only control one person...yourself. You can not control what your daughter does, but you can learn to live a fulfilling life in spite of your daughter's poor choices. She is not you; you are not her. </p><p></p><p>You deserve to be safe in your own home. Hugs and I'm really sad about your heartbreak and I know it is a REAL heartbreak.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 616343, member: 1550"] Hi there and so sorry for your hurting mommy heart. I don't know, however, that I can advise you to do nothing and not upset your daughter. in my opinion that will only encourage her to keep doing what she is doing and to end up in jail one day. Also, she is not behaving in a way that is healthy for herself or for you (and YOU matter too). Why are you afraid of her? If she leaves the house, what will make things worse for her? Isn't she already being unsafe even though you are trying to offer her comfort and support and lots of love? Anything can happen in her lifestyle even if she lives at home and it doesn't sound like she is there full time. She is eighteen and there is nothing you can do to protect her. Scary, I know! I was in the same boat once. But legally she can do what she likes and the drug lifestyle is dangerous, no matter if she lives home part time or not. Hey...about Facebook. Aren't YOU paying for her cell phone? Then you have a right to check her Facebook, room, and cell phone whenever you like since she is living dangerously AND at home rent free. She is breaking the law. in my opinion you have every right to try to keep her safe by any means possible, including seriously invading her property. So she gets mad? Big deal. Don't YOU get mad? Does she care? Don't you deserve the same consideration? Most of our drug involved kids need to hit rock bottom without our helping them in order to decide to change. She will not be able to make it at work if she has a record (which she is just about asking for) or if she is high on drugs (my daughter, who was an addict once, told me that if you use it you sell it...she's clean now with no reason to lie). Can you tell us more about her story? Do you have younger kids at home? Are you getting criticism from some others who are making you feel guilty? Do you realize that this is 100% your daughter's decision and that you are guilt-free in this? I believe it will be impossible to stop your child over the long haul from raging at you. Has she ever assaulted you or threatened to? If she has, have you ever called the police? Has she stolen from you? I highly recommend going to Nar-Anon meetings for face time support. If you don't like Nar-Anon, find a good therapist to help you see things straight and take good care of yourself. You can only control one person...yourself. You can not control what your daughter does, but you can learn to live a fulfilling life in spite of your daughter's poor choices. She is not you; you are not her. You deserve to be safe in your own home. Hugs and I'm really sad about your heartbreak and I know it is a REAL heartbreak. [/QUOTE]
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My teen is dealing drugs!
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