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Substance Abuse
My teen is dealing drugs!
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 616416" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I don't agree about the kicking her out. If she is a minor, yes, but you already have no leverage over her. She does what she wants and puts you at risk in your own house by doing illegal activities. If she is dealing drugs she is in touch with some very dangerous people who would not mind breaking into your house. Do you have a security system? Your daughter is not safe, in spite of your allowing her home. The difference, the only one, is that she is putting you at risk too. My daughter had many people after her. We didn't know it, of course, but she told us about her "exciting" life in Drugland after the fact and there was at least one person who was threatening to kill her if she didn't pay up for some drugs. She lived at home, but she still was not safe. She was not safe until she quit her lifestyle and that still may not have been enough...she left the state!! Are you ok at being put at risk? Nothing against your daughter...ours did it to us too. When they are in Drugland, they do not think much.</p><p></p><p>One very hard thing for all of us to accept is that we have 0 control over our grown kids. We can only control one person...ourselves. Your daughter will not listen to you just because s he can come home anytime she wants. In fact, she may think of you as weak and lose respect that you allow her to treat you the way she does. When my daughter was either late eighteen or early nineteen, we caught her having a drug party in our home and finally packed her bags. She panicked and called her brother who is very straight and lived in another state. She got him to let her stay with him knowing that, unlike us, he would be a zero tolerance kind of guy and throw her into the street penniless if she so much as lit up a cigarette in his home. She quit cigarettes there. She quit everything. But her life was not comfy, cozy at her brother's house. He made her work hard, pay rent, walk to her job in all kinds of weather, and clean the house. If she had stayed with us, knowing I was softhearted toward her, I don't think she would have quit everything like that. </p><p></p><p>Not saying you SHOULD kick her out, but there comes a point where many of us find it's for the best for our adult children. Otherwise many of them surf off of us and never grow up. And our own health and well being can be severely affected. You matter too!!!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 616416, member: 1550"] I don't agree about the kicking her out. If she is a minor, yes, but you already have no leverage over her. She does what she wants and puts you at risk in your own house by doing illegal activities. If she is dealing drugs she is in touch with some very dangerous people who would not mind breaking into your house. Do you have a security system? Your daughter is not safe, in spite of your allowing her home. The difference, the only one, is that she is putting you at risk too. My daughter had many people after her. We didn't know it, of course, but she told us about her "exciting" life in Drugland after the fact and there was at least one person who was threatening to kill her if she didn't pay up for some drugs. She lived at home, but she still was not safe. She was not safe until she quit her lifestyle and that still may not have been enough...she left the state!! Are you ok at being put at risk? Nothing against your daughter...ours did it to us too. When they are in Drugland, they do not think much. One very hard thing for all of us to accept is that we have 0 control over our grown kids. We can only control one person...ourselves. Your daughter will not listen to you just because s he can come home anytime she wants. In fact, she may think of you as weak and lose respect that you allow her to treat you the way she does. When my daughter was either late eighteen or early nineteen, we caught her having a drug party in our home and finally packed her bags. She panicked and called her brother who is very straight and lived in another state. She got him to let her stay with him knowing that, unlike us, he would be a zero tolerance kind of guy and throw her into the street penniless if she so much as lit up a cigarette in his home. She quit cigarettes there. She quit everything. But her life was not comfy, cozy at her brother's house. He made her work hard, pay rent, walk to her job in all kinds of weather, and clean the house. If she had stayed with us, knowing I was softhearted toward her, I don't think she would have quit everything like that. Not saying you SHOULD kick her out, but there comes a point where many of us find it's for the best for our adult children. Otherwise many of them surf off of us and never grow up. And our own health and well being can be severely affected. You matter too!!! [/QUOTE]
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