Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
My Trip Home & My Mom.......very long sorry
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 547802" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Yes, I have the same concerns about taking care of Mom, especially with the safety issues. And safety is right at the top of the list as number 1. </p><p></p><p>I love her. We've manage to build a rather close relationship over recent years. But I won't put Travis and my safety in jeopardy to care for her. I know better than anyone in the family what my mother is capable of doing during a psychotic break. She's attempted to end my life more than once in years past. (not as herself mind you, but you know what I mean) Bringing her here would mean that would be a very real possibility given the opportunity and the right circumstances. Which I would not do. She'd be on the ground floor and we'd be on the upper floor and it would take a lot out of her just to get up my steps. But it would also put the furbabies in possible danger and they'd be on the ground floor with her. And there are just the general safety issues as well. Turning on the gas stove and forgetting it's on.......ect. </p><p></p><p>So........that would have to be settled in my mind how I would/could cope with that and she'd have to be medicated properly. Since I don't see her cooperating with the medications, it's not looking like that is going to happen. </p><p></p><p>When I told her she could come stay with me I had no idea she was as bad as she is. She is already nearly to the point of not being able to live with family. Simply because the paranoia is just so very difficult to deal with. Ok, forget difficult, it can be pure hades on earth to deal with day in and day out. </p><p></p><p>I am the logical person to care for mom at this stage. </p><p></p><p>That does not mean I'm necessarily going to do so. </p><p></p><p> I'm not stupid. I know the reality that is my mother, and I've got a pretty realistic view of how she probably is now although I got to see her on two "good days." My health and my own issues post Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) is making the odds of her coming here very low, if at all. IF she did, it could only be with assisted living which would devolve into full nursing care as she grew worse or a nursing home when her funds finally played out. That would be the only way. </p><p></p><p>Honestly, I'm fairly sure she's going to wind up with sis in texas. Sis has a mother in law addition to her house she had build specifically for mom. Mom has totally forgotten (at least while I was there) that she ever owned/loved her dog putzie, so she is back to hating dogs........I have 2 in the house, one that is a puppy. Mom hats cats. I have Bruce. So I'm thinking even Mom is thinking sis in texas but won't tell me that for fear of hurting my feelings. </p><p></p><p>Or mom might drive straight into another car head on before any of us can even discuss it and it will be a moot point completely. Or turn on the gas for her stove, go hunting for matches, forget she turned on the stove, and lights a match and BOOM!</p><p></p><p>The last, is bro's major fear. He's afraid of who she'll take with her when it happens as well. </p><p></p><p>While I love my mom, I think I'm going to be sitting this one out and just help from the sidelines as much as I can........which is quite a bit. Sis in texas' health is far far better than mine and she has her husband there to help, even if mom can't stand him. </p><p></p><p>This hoovers major though.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 547802, member: 84"] Yes, I have the same concerns about taking care of Mom, especially with the safety issues. And safety is right at the top of the list as number 1. I love her. We've manage to build a rather close relationship over recent years. But I won't put Travis and my safety in jeopardy to care for her. I know better than anyone in the family what my mother is capable of doing during a psychotic break. She's attempted to end my life more than once in years past. (not as herself mind you, but you know what I mean) Bringing her here would mean that would be a very real possibility given the opportunity and the right circumstances. Which I would not do. She'd be on the ground floor and we'd be on the upper floor and it would take a lot out of her just to get up my steps. But it would also put the furbabies in possible danger and they'd be on the ground floor with her. And there are just the general safety issues as well. Turning on the gas stove and forgetting it's on.......ect. So........that would have to be settled in my mind how I would/could cope with that and she'd have to be medicated properly. Since I don't see her cooperating with the medications, it's not looking like that is going to happen. When I told her she could come stay with me I had no idea she was as bad as she is. She is already nearly to the point of not being able to live with family. Simply because the paranoia is just so very difficult to deal with. Ok, forget difficult, it can be pure hades on earth to deal with day in and day out. I am the logical person to care for mom at this stage. That does not mean I'm necessarily going to do so. I'm not stupid. I know the reality that is my mother, and I've got a pretty realistic view of how she probably is now although I got to see her on two "good days." My health and my own issues post Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) is making the odds of her coming here very low, if at all. IF she did, it could only be with assisted living which would devolve into full nursing care as she grew worse or a nursing home when her funds finally played out. That would be the only way. Honestly, I'm fairly sure she's going to wind up with sis in texas. Sis has a mother in law addition to her house she had build specifically for mom. Mom has totally forgotten (at least while I was there) that she ever owned/loved her dog putzie, so she is back to hating dogs........I have 2 in the house, one that is a puppy. Mom hats cats. I have Bruce. So I'm thinking even Mom is thinking sis in texas but won't tell me that for fear of hurting my feelings. Or mom might drive straight into another car head on before any of us can even discuss it and it will be a moot point completely. Or turn on the gas for her stove, go hunting for matches, forget she turned on the stove, and lights a match and BOOM! The last, is bro's major fear. He's afraid of who she'll take with her when it happens as well. While I love my mom, I think I'm going to be sitting this one out and just help from the sidelines as much as I can........which is quite a bit. Sis in texas' health is far far better than mine and she has her husband there to help, even if mom can't stand him. This hoovers major though. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
My Trip Home & My Mom.......very long sorry
Top