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MySpace question: What would you do?
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<blockquote data-quote="hearts and roses" data-source="post: 217408" data-attributes="member: 2211"><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: indigo">About a year or so before difficult child was kidnapped and sexually assaulted at 15, we caught her 'talking' on MySpace and AIM in inappropriate terms and in suggestive ways with her peers - all the kiddos were her age and they were both boys and girls. When I spoke with her I focused on the terminology and we formed some new rules in regard to computer use (only in the living room, passwords and timers). The 2nd and 3rd time we had to address this, H kinda sorta blew up on her...I had to calm things a bit so we could have a conversation about appropriate use of language when chatting with boys as well as things about anatomy, etc. Yes, we were all a little embarrassed, but too bad. I wished later that I had been a bit stronger in my discussions - perhaps if I had put more fear into her, difficult child would never have spoken to a complete stranger and agree to meet him 5 days later and go out of the state with him, even though she later admitted she was scared out of her mind. Afterwards, she realized a few things that she didn't learn from our discussions. </span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: indigo">MWM, I think you need to have a very open and honest discussion with daughter about the appropriateness of leaving messages on MySpace (and AIM). Remind her that although her profile is private, her so callled 'friends' can show their friends her page if they are looking at it together - that is how my daughter met many new people she never knew before from out of town. And while acknowledging that she is a well developed 12 year old, you must also caution her about the kind of attention she will get as such. Not all of it is good. You don't want to make her fear boys and men, but at the same time, she needs to understand that it's okay to not be so trustful of everyone she meets, especially when they are being nice to her & paying her compliments. Maybe Little Red Riding Hood would be a good story to read together...I'm not kidding - that is a story that the police officer who handled difficult child's sexual asault went over with her. </span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: indigo">It's such a fine line but with care it can be done. I don't think you need to go crazy about everything all at once - just reminding her to be careful about what she posts is a start. You're an attentive mother, we all know that. But in today's world, age doesn't seem to mean a thing when they have internet access.</span></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hearts and roses, post: 217408, member: 2211"] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=indigo]About a year or so before difficult child was kidnapped and sexually assaulted at 15, we caught her 'talking' on MySpace and AIM in inappropriate terms and in suggestive ways with her peers - all the kiddos were her age and they were both boys and girls. When I spoke with her I focused on the terminology and we formed some new rules in regard to computer use (only in the living room, passwords and timers). The 2nd and 3rd time we had to address this, H kinda sorta blew up on her...I had to calm things a bit so we could have a conversation about appropriate use of language when chatting with boys as well as things about anatomy, etc. Yes, we were all a little embarrassed, but too bad. I wished later that I had been a bit stronger in my discussions - perhaps if I had put more fear into her, difficult child would never have spoken to a complete stranger and agree to meet him 5 days later and go out of the state with him, even though she later admitted she was scared out of her mind. Afterwards, she realized a few things that she didn't learn from our discussions. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=indigo][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=indigo]MWM, I think you need to have a very open and honest discussion with daughter about the appropriateness of leaving messages on MySpace (and AIM). Remind her that although her profile is private, her so callled 'friends' can show their friends her page if they are looking at it together - that is how my daughter met many new people she never knew before from out of town. And while acknowledging that she is a well developed 12 year old, you must also caution her about the kind of attention she will get as such. Not all of it is good. You don't want to make her fear boys and men, but at the same time, she needs to understand that it's okay to not be so trustful of everyone she meets, especially when they are being nice to her & paying her compliments. Maybe Little Red Riding Hood would be a good story to read together...I'm not kidding - that is a story that the police officer who handled difficult child's sexual asault went over with her. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=indigo][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=indigo]It's such a fine line but with care it can be done. I don't think you need to go crazy about everything all at once - just reminding her to be careful about what she posts is a start. You're an attentive mother, we all know that. But in today's world, age doesn't seem to mean a thing when they have internet access.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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