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The Watercooler
Narcicistic father. Is he too old for me to take a stand?
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<blockquote data-quote="SuZir" data-source="post: 546187" data-attributes="member: 14557"><p>Well, it is never too late to stand up for yourself! It's not about how old he is, it is about you deciding what you will take and what you won't.</p><p></p><p>But I have admit, that if I were you, I would consider also inheritance issue. To be frank, how important that money would be for you? You have clearly worked for that money over 21 (LOL, I'm guessing it may be significantly over 21) years, so depending his health I would consider if it is smart to give up so late in the game. That of course depends about how significant inheritance would be for you.</p><p></p><p>My dad has similar characteristics, though he is likely more Borderline (BPD) than narcissistic and I have dealt with him my whole life. You certainly have my sympathies whatever you choose to do.</p><p></p><p>Others are likely to tell that this is about self-respect and it is right thing to stood up and defend yourself, and they are probably right. But you and your sister seem to have ways to cope with the abuse and sometimes it may be enough that you know it is not about you, it is him and his issues and decide to just go all teflon and go through the final years with him. Just listen and not let anything really stick. Detach completely emotionally but go through the movements. But that of course is only worth it, if pay day is big enough.</p><p></p><p>You don't own anything for your father, so do what is right for <u><strong>You</strong></u>!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SuZir, post: 546187, member: 14557"] Well, it is never too late to stand up for yourself! It's not about how old he is, it is about you deciding what you will take and what you won't. But I have admit, that if I were you, I would consider also inheritance issue. To be frank, how important that money would be for you? You have clearly worked for that money over 21 (LOL, I'm guessing it may be significantly over 21) years, so depending his health I would consider if it is smart to give up so late in the game. That of course depends about how significant inheritance would be for you. My dad has similar characteristics, though he is likely more Borderline (BPD) than narcissistic and I have dealt with him my whole life. You certainly have my sympathies whatever you choose to do. Others are likely to tell that this is about self-respect and it is right thing to stood up and defend yourself, and they are probably right. But you and your sister seem to have ways to cope with the abuse and sometimes it may be enough that you know it is not about you, it is him and his issues and decide to just go all teflon and go through the final years with him. Just listen and not let anything really stick. Detach completely emotionally but go through the movements. But that of course is only worth it, if pay day is big enough. You don't own anything for your father, so do what is right for [U][B]You[/B][/U]! [/QUOTE]
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Narcicistic father. Is he too old for me to take a stand?
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