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Narcissistic Personality Disorder
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<blockquote data-quote="hearts and roses" data-source="post: 314141" data-attributes="member: 2211"><p><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: royalblue">I did research on this a couple of years ago in relation to my sister's behavior. Unfortunately, she is the one closest to me geographically, though not emotionally. I love her but can only take her in very small doses. It took some counseling for me to learn how to not only detach from her drama and outburst, but to also preserve my own personal sense of sanity and not feel victimized by her and her actions. She has a family, I work for her H, and am close with her oldest son. It's been difficult to say the least and I've posted about her here several times.</span></span></p><p></p><p><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: royalblue">So, Witz, do you ever stop worrying? I don't know if that's something you can simply turn off. Having a true diagnosis of what L's issue is will help you put some of her behaviors into perspective and with some practice, you could teach yourself how NOT to get sukked into her vortex of insanity and skewed thinking. You should be able to listen (or hang up and not listen) without feeling guilty about it or her or anything. Keep reminding yourself that there really isn't anything you can do to change the way she views things or how she reacts to certain situations, or her sense of overblown self worth (and on the other hand, perhaps her feelings of exremely low self worth). </span></span></p><p></p><p><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: royalblue">It was a daily practice for me for a while there in dealing with my sister. And in my case, this practice really helped me in terms of dealing with difficult child and even my H on some levels. The amazing thing about my sister is that she is an over achiever. She researched and learns new things all the time; she's constantly reinventing herself and exploring other areas outside of the mundane. She's extremely intelligent and I certainly cannot take that away from her, not would I want to. But what's nuts is that she seems to try and solicit compliments and major kudos for every one of her small or large accomplishments, as if having accomplished them for her own self isn't enough. She says disparaging things about herself but prefices those remarks by listing all the amazing things she's done. My sister is 53 years old. At this stage of the game, I really don't think it's healthy for her to be soliciting congratulations for every little thing she does, especially when she's already resepected and well-regarded in so many circles. It's just wierd. And if you do compliment her in any way, she blows you off and sometimes will even become hypercritical of your compliment, accusing of you of having an ulterior motive for the compliment. </span></span></p><p></p><p><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: royalblue">Anyway, as you already know, it's difficult dealing with someone like this. But thankfully, now that you know what you know, you can turn the focus back on you and how you will react or behave to keep your own sanity. There really isn't anything you can do to change her or make her see this and do something about it. Hugs~</span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hearts and roses, post: 314141, member: 2211"] [SIZE=4][COLOR=royalblue]I did research on this a couple of years ago in relation to my sister's behavior. Unfortunately, she is the one closest to me geographically, though not emotionally. I love her but can only take her in very small doses. It took some counseling for me to learn how to not only detach from her drama and outburst, but to also preserve my own personal sense of sanity and not feel victimized by her and her actions. She has a family, I work for her H, and am close with her oldest son. It's been difficult to say the least and I've posted about her here several times.[/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=4][COLOR=royalblue]So, Witz, do you ever stop worrying? I don't know if that's something you can simply turn off. Having a true diagnosis of what L's issue is will help you put some of her behaviors into perspective and with some practice, you could teach yourself how NOT to get sukked into her vortex of insanity and skewed thinking. You should be able to listen (or hang up and not listen) without feeling guilty about it or her or anything. Keep reminding yourself that there really isn't anything you can do to change the way she views things or how she reacts to certain situations, or her sense of overblown self worth (and on the other hand, perhaps her feelings of exremely low self worth). [/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=4][COLOR=royalblue]It was a daily practice for me for a while there in dealing with my sister. And in my case, this practice really helped me in terms of dealing with difficult child and even my H on some levels. The amazing thing about my sister is that she is an over achiever. She researched and learns new things all the time; she's constantly reinventing herself and exploring other areas outside of the mundane. She's extremely intelligent and I certainly cannot take that away from her, not would I want to. But what's nuts is that she seems to try and solicit compliments and major kudos for every one of her small or large accomplishments, as if having accomplished them for her own self isn't enough. She says disparaging things about herself but prefices those remarks by listing all the amazing things she's done. My sister is 53 years old. At this stage of the game, I really don't think it's healthy for her to be soliciting congratulations for every little thing she does, especially when she's already resepected and well-regarded in so many circles. It's just wierd. And if you do compliment her in any way, she blows you off and sometimes will even become hypercritical of your compliment, accusing of you of having an ulterior motive for the compliment. [/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=4][COLOR=royalblue]Anyway, as you already know, it's difficult dealing with someone like this. But thankfully, now that you know what you know, you can turn the focus back on you and how you will react or behave to keep your own sanity. There really isn't anything you can do to change her or make her see this and do something about it. Hugs~[/COLOR][/SIZE] [/QUOTE]
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