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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 660225" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p>I am a Christian and I struggled with this myself.</p><p>I believe in helping people but as others have said, there is a fine line between helping and enabling.</p><p>For me, I know I did everything I could, I gave my son numerous opportunities to get his life on track. I had to come to accept that he didn't want to live his life on track at least not on the track that I felt he should. With that I had to let him go. I did not turn away from my son any more than you did not turn away from your daughter. We have been there for them, we have done for them, and THEY CHOOSE to be ungrateful for the help offered. They have made it clear that they want to live their lives on their terms but when they get into a bind well then they want mommy and daddy to come to their rescue. You must understand that they cannot have it both ways. They cannot abuse us then expect us to rescue them.</p><p>One thing that is a constant for me is I love my son and I will continue to pray for him. I also understand that my prayers may not be answered in the way I want or in a time frame I want. I have accepted that it may be after I leave this earth that my son will start to make better choices, or not.</p><p>We cannot live their lives for them. We have raised them with morals and values and what they choose to do or not to do with that is on them not on us.</p><p>Please let go of the guilt.</p><p>((HUGS))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 660225, member: 18516"] I am a Christian and I struggled with this myself. I believe in helping people but as others have said, there is a fine line between helping and enabling. For me, I know I did everything I could, I gave my son numerous opportunities to get his life on track. I had to come to accept that he didn't want to live his life on track at least not on the track that I felt he should. With that I had to let him go. I did not turn away from my son any more than you did not turn away from your daughter. We have been there for them, we have done for them, and THEY CHOOSE to be ungrateful for the help offered. They have made it clear that they want to live their lives on their terms but when they get into a bind well then they want mommy and daddy to come to their rescue. You must understand that they cannot have it both ways. They cannot abuse us then expect us to rescue them. One thing that is a constant for me is I love my son and I will continue to pray for him. I also understand that my prayers may not be answered in the way I want or in a time frame I want. I have accepted that it may be after I leave this earth that my son will start to make better choices, or not. We cannot live their lives for them. We have raised them with morals and values and what they choose to do or not to do with that is on them not on us. Please let go of the guilt. ((HUGS)) [/QUOTE]
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