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General Parenting
Need adoption advice for child with ODD
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<blockquote data-quote="JJJ" data-source="post: 469072" data-attributes="member: 1169"><p>You have a very hard decision ahead of you. </p><p></p><p>All 4 of mine were adopted via foster care. Eeyore was the most significantly behavior disordered of the group, and we had a psychiatrist recommend we dissolve his adoption and several family members expressed deep concern. Yet, except when he sneaks wheat, he is doing very well, often on honor roll, etc. </p><p></p><p>Kanga had years of therapy, many psychiatric hospital stays, many medications, etc and is still violent, defiant and severly mentally ill. She ended up being placed out of our home at 13; but we were very lucky to get grant funding for that as our adoption subsidy did not cover the extremely high cost. </p><p></p><p>Which way will your foster son go??? I don't know. Has he attempted to harm other people? animals? himself? Does he have issues with inppropriate bowel movements? Was he sexually abused? Was he drug-exposed in utero? Do you know the birthparents mental health and/or substance abuse history? </p><p></p><p>You can do all the research but it is going to come down to your and your husband's gut feelings. If either one of you have serious misgivings, you need to listen to them. Adoption is forever, and some of the services he receives as a foster child will disappear after an adoption. But, without the adoption, you may lose him or both of them.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="JJJ, post: 469072, member: 1169"] You have a very hard decision ahead of you. All 4 of mine were adopted via foster care. Eeyore was the most significantly behavior disordered of the group, and we had a psychiatrist recommend we dissolve his adoption and several family members expressed deep concern. Yet, except when he sneaks wheat, he is doing very well, often on honor roll, etc. Kanga had years of therapy, many psychiatric hospital stays, many medications, etc and is still violent, defiant and severly mentally ill. She ended up being placed out of our home at 13; but we were very lucky to get grant funding for that as our adoption subsidy did not cover the extremely high cost. Which way will your foster son go??? I don't know. Has he attempted to harm other people? animals? himself? Does he have issues with inppropriate bowel movements? Was he sexually abused? Was he drug-exposed in utero? Do you know the birthparents mental health and/or substance abuse history? You can do all the research but it is going to come down to your and your husband's gut feelings. If either one of you have serious misgivings, you need to listen to them. Adoption is forever, and some of the services he receives as a foster child will disappear after an adoption. But, without the adoption, you may lose him or both of them. [/QUOTE]
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Need adoption advice for child with ODD
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