Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Need everyone's help ASAP
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 668211" data-attributes="member: 15801"><p>It is really hard... we kicked my son out at 18. And to be honest things did get worse for awhile. I dont think kicking him out made things worse they were headed that way anyways but we did end up going through him being arrested, spending time in jail and being homeless. Although he has been through a lot, in the process he has met a lot of different people and I think realized that in fact he has parents who love him!! I think he has seen people who have not had the support and love he has had and in the long run it gave him some appreciation for us.... but believe me there were times when he hated me, and told me I was an awful mother etc. Pay no attention to any of that... that is the addict blaming everyone else for his troubles. There was a time when my son told ue he just couldnt tell ue hs loved us.. At some point that changed and he tells me he loves me at the end of every phone call now.</p><p></p><p>One piece of advice I got when we kicked him out, was to stay in touch with him, to keep letting him know we loved him even if he did not respond. We did that and when he got arrested he called us. Since then we have taken the stand that we will help him when he wants to help himself..... and through that we have been through numerous rehabs when he wanted out of whatever situation he was in. So when he got to that point we always helped him get into treatment.... and he was kicked otu of many and it would start over again.</p><p></p><p>And this time he made the decision himself, for himself to get into treatment and is doing well..... he has a different attitude this time.</p><p></p><p>So my point is, you can keep letting him know you love him.... but you do not need to enable him doing drugs, you dont have to protect him from his own decisions.... but you can let him know that if and when he wants help you will be there for him. And really you cant do more than that.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 668211, member: 15801"] It is really hard... we kicked my son out at 18. And to be honest things did get worse for awhile. I dont think kicking him out made things worse they were headed that way anyways but we did end up going through him being arrested, spending time in jail and being homeless. Although he has been through a lot, in the process he has met a lot of different people and I think realized that in fact he has parents who love him!! I think he has seen people who have not had the support and love he has had and in the long run it gave him some appreciation for us.... but believe me there were times when he hated me, and told me I was an awful mother etc. Pay no attention to any of that... that is the addict blaming everyone else for his troubles. There was a time when my son told ue he just couldnt tell ue hs loved us.. At some point that changed and he tells me he loves me at the end of every phone call now. One piece of advice I got when we kicked him out, was to stay in touch with him, to keep letting him know we loved him even if he did not respond. We did that and when he got arrested he called us. Since then we have taken the stand that we will help him when he wants to help himself..... and through that we have been through numerous rehabs when he wanted out of whatever situation he was in. So when he got to that point we always helped him get into treatment.... and he was kicked otu of many and it would start over again. And this time he made the decision himself, for himself to get into treatment and is doing well..... he has a different attitude this time. So my point is, you can keep letting him know you love him.... but you do not need to enable him doing drugs, you dont have to protect him from his own decisions.... but you can let him know that if and when he wants help you will be there for him. And really you cant do more than that. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Need everyone's help ASAP
Top