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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 331069" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>It is a hard thing for adults to figure out, even harder for a kindergartner.</p><p> </p><p>He states that the anger just comes and is around the school. That may be a starting point. I am sure that "anger" scares him. Until triggers can be identified, you can work on the recognizing of the "anger".</p><p> </p><p>Ask him if he ever feels it before it makes him act out. Ask him if there is anything he can do to be boss over the anger so it doesn't make him do things he doesn't want to do. Would it help if he went to a quiet corner away from the other kids to regroup? Let him know that his teacher will help if she knows that is what he needs. This is a lot to ask of a kindergartener. I was fortunate that my difficult child was 11 years old and could understand the tools he was given.</p><p> </p><p>With my difficult child, he had to learn how to recognize his anxiety before we could figure out the triggers.</p><p> </p><p>Being 5 years old is a big step towards being a big kid. That new found sense of abilities can be overwhelming. He may not feel ready for that yet. I am so glad you have a 1/2 day Kindergarten. I am a strong opposer of full day Kindergarten for this reason, not every kid is ready but unfortunately around here, parents look at the financial part of all day kindergarten (cheaper than day care) instead of their child's needs.</p><p> </p><p>My difficult child was enterring 5th grade - another large step to being a big kid. His fears did extend to not being able to do well in college to not getting a job to take care of a family. I had to explain to him that each year will prepare him for the responisibility of college and family.</p><p> </p><p>The Adderall may indeed be feeding into some of this. I am not familiar with it so I do not know. The reason it is hard for psychiatrists to treat is that each person reacts so differently to each medication. psychiatrists will make their best educational guess with the little they really know about their patient. They don't know how your son will react but they will listen and understand if you think the medication is creating side effects that are not beneficial. My difficult child was on a medication that appeared to be helping but as time went by, it became a disinhibitive. He was not afraid to talk back to teachers or stand his ground. Once we took him off of that, he became more respectful. It was a hard Winter/Spring as I made the choice of dealing with that behavior to get him through his class work. It was keeping his anxiety at bay. </p><p> </p><p>My difficult child was also on medications that cause major problems in many kids but was the miracle drug for him.</p><p> </p><p>Are you keeping a journal? I did during the nightmare year we had. I purchased a yearly planner and recorded things I was concerned about including the time it took place. As we were changing medications, I also recorded what medications I gave at what time. I recorded the unwanted behaviors at the time of day they occurred. I took this calendar to every therapist visit to remember to cover anything I may have forgotten.</p><p> </p><p>I have a daughter who is 6 years older than difficult child. That means she was 17 years old and I could focus on difficult child's issues more so it was much easier for me. You have a typical two year old and a soon-to-be newborn. Your days will be full of kids. Follow your instincts and continue doing the best you can. It will be a rollercoaster ride but you have found a site where other moms truely understand. You will even find yourself rejoicing over the smallest of victories but feel your friends will not understand your joy. Bring them here and we will help you celebrate.</p><p> </p><p>I hope you have found some helpful advise somewhere on this site. Remember, we only can go off what you write and we know it is very difficult to explain EVERYTHING. It is good to get all kinds of advise to give you various things to try IF they feel right to you. Follow your instincts. I think they are good.</p><p> </p><p>P.S. You are not a failure. You have recognized a lot of things going on and are willing to be the warrior mom it takes to figure it out.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 331069, member: 5096"] It is a hard thing for adults to figure out, even harder for a kindergartner. He states that the anger just comes and is around the school. That may be a starting point. I am sure that "anger" scares him. Until triggers can be identified, you can work on the recognizing of the "anger". Ask him if he ever feels it before it makes him act out. Ask him if there is anything he can do to be boss over the anger so it doesn't make him do things he doesn't want to do. Would it help if he went to a quiet corner away from the other kids to regroup? Let him know that his teacher will help if she knows that is what he needs. This is a lot to ask of a kindergartener. I was fortunate that my difficult child was 11 years old and could understand the tools he was given. With my difficult child, he had to learn how to recognize his anxiety before we could figure out the triggers. Being 5 years old is a big step towards being a big kid. That new found sense of abilities can be overwhelming. He may not feel ready for that yet. I am so glad you have a 1/2 day Kindergarten. I am a strong opposer of full day Kindergarten for this reason, not every kid is ready but unfortunately around here, parents look at the financial part of all day kindergarten (cheaper than day care) instead of their child's needs. My difficult child was enterring 5th grade - another large step to being a big kid. His fears did extend to not being able to do well in college to not getting a job to take care of a family. I had to explain to him that each year will prepare him for the responisibility of college and family. The Adderall may indeed be feeding into some of this. I am not familiar with it so I do not know. The reason it is hard for psychiatrists to treat is that each person reacts so differently to each medication. psychiatrists will make their best educational guess with the little they really know about their patient. They don't know how your son will react but they will listen and understand if you think the medication is creating side effects that are not beneficial. My difficult child was on a medication that appeared to be helping but as time went by, it became a disinhibitive. He was not afraid to talk back to teachers or stand his ground. Once we took him off of that, he became more respectful. It was a hard Winter/Spring as I made the choice of dealing with that behavior to get him through his class work. It was keeping his anxiety at bay. My difficult child was also on medications that cause major problems in many kids but was the miracle drug for him. Are you keeping a journal? I did during the nightmare year we had. I purchased a yearly planner and recorded things I was concerned about including the time it took place. As we were changing medications, I also recorded what medications I gave at what time. I recorded the unwanted behaviors at the time of day they occurred. I took this calendar to every therapist visit to remember to cover anything I may have forgotten. I have a daughter who is 6 years older than difficult child. That means she was 17 years old and I could focus on difficult child's issues more so it was much easier for me. You have a typical two year old and a soon-to-be newborn. Your days will be full of kids. Follow your instincts and continue doing the best you can. It will be a rollercoaster ride but you have found a site where other moms truely understand. You will even find yourself rejoicing over the smallest of victories but feel your friends will not understand your joy. Bring them here and we will help you celebrate. I hope you have found some helpful advise somewhere on this site. Remember, we only can go off what you write and we know it is very difficult to explain EVERYTHING. It is good to get all kinds of advise to give you various things to try IF they feel right to you. Follow your instincts. I think they are good. P.S. You are not a failure. You have recognized a lot of things going on and are willing to be the warrior mom it takes to figure it out. [/QUOTE]
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