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<blockquote data-quote="rejectedmom" data-source="post: 489473" data-attributes="member: 2315"><p>As you may remember easy child/difficult child is in a psyc treatment center and has been for over a month now. I have POA and have been sorting out his financials, insurance, tax audit dealing with his doctors and counsilors and social workers and many other things as well as doing all the christmas shopping and prep and getting the house ready for easy child/difficult child to move back in with us so we can rent his place out. husband goes to work...that is it. </p><p></p><p>When all this started husband told me he would give me whatever support or help I needed from him. Well, whenever I call him during the day, he is too busy to talk. so I have to wait till evening. He is gone all week and only comes home on weekends. It has been this way (as per his choice not mine) our entire marriage of 40 years. I am tired of doing everything and husband knows it. So tonight I told him all I had accomplished this week and what I needed him to do this weekend. His response? He is going to get a haircut and go visit his father in the nursing home.</p><p></p><p>I told him that I knew he was going to take what I was about to say wrong but that I needed to say it, I told him that he often goes 3-4 months without seeing his father (I usually have to push and prod him to go) yet as soon as I need him for something, he says he has to go for a visit. I told husband that I did not mind him visiting his father but that I did mind him using it as an excuse to avoid unpleasant tasks. I also told him that I hated that he continues to set me up in this way to look like the bad guy when it is he that is in the wrong. I said that he could visit his dad next week after we got everything done that needed to be done for our son who is to be released on Thursday. husband's response? He got up and went to bed without a word. Yep, he left me alone stressed out and stewing to myself. So now I'm going to have to find a handy man to finish up the bathroom this week so I can move back into my bedroom and give son the guest room. I'll also have to see if the hired man will move the furniture for me. </p><p></p><p>I am mentally and physically exhausted and have been having heart problems as a result. The doctor is fiddling with my medications trying to find a mix that will prevent my heart from flipping out while at the same time suppressing my thyroid so I do not get more growths and also controll my blood sugar. My arthritis is flaring again and I am in alot of pain and my husband is acting like a big fat selfish jerk. He <em><u><strong>is</strong></u></em> a selfish difficult child, he always has been. I know that, but it still hurts to need a real partner and not have one... Know what I mean?? </p><p></p><p>My doctor gave me a big hug when I saw him this week because he can see what I am dealing with. But husband? Well he is all about playing the marytr and making things all about him. husband says that we will never travel again now because of our son. He is walking around with this huge cloud over his head. He is all doom and gloom and so totally not what I or easy child/difficult child need. I just want to smak some sence into him.</p><p></p><p>Whew! Thanks ladies...I needed to get that off my chest.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="rejectedmom, post: 489473, member: 2315"] As you may remember easy child/difficult child is in a psyc treatment center and has been for over a month now. I have POA and have been sorting out his financials, insurance, tax audit dealing with his doctors and counsilors and social workers and many other things as well as doing all the christmas shopping and prep and getting the house ready for easy child/difficult child to move back in with us so we can rent his place out. husband goes to work...that is it. When all this started husband told me he would give me whatever support or help I needed from him. Well, whenever I call him during the day, he is too busy to talk. so I have to wait till evening. He is gone all week and only comes home on weekends. It has been this way (as per his choice not mine) our entire marriage of 40 years. I am tired of doing everything and husband knows it. So tonight I told him all I had accomplished this week and what I needed him to do this weekend. His response? He is going to get a haircut and go visit his father in the nursing home. I told him that I knew he was going to take what I was about to say wrong but that I needed to say it, I told him that he often goes 3-4 months without seeing his father (I usually have to push and prod him to go) yet as soon as I need him for something, he says he has to go for a visit. I told husband that I did not mind him visiting his father but that I did mind him using it as an excuse to avoid unpleasant tasks. I also told him that I hated that he continues to set me up in this way to look like the bad guy when it is he that is in the wrong. I said that he could visit his dad next week after we got everything done that needed to be done for our son who is to be released on Thursday. husband's response? He got up and went to bed without a word. Yep, he left me alone stressed out and stewing to myself. So now I'm going to have to find a handy man to finish up the bathroom this week so I can move back into my bedroom and give son the guest room. I'll also have to see if the hired man will move the furniture for me. I am mentally and physically exhausted and have been having heart problems as a result. The doctor is fiddling with my medications trying to find a mix that will prevent my heart from flipping out while at the same time suppressing my thyroid so I do not get more growths and also controll my blood sugar. My arthritis is flaring again and I am in alot of pain and my husband is acting like a big fat selfish jerk. He [I][U][B]is[/B][/U][/I] a selfish difficult child, he always has been. I know that, but it still hurts to need a real partner and not have one... Know what I mean?? My doctor gave me a big hug when I saw him this week because he can see what I am dealing with. But husband? Well he is all about playing the marytr and making things all about him. husband says that we will never travel again now because of our son. He is walking around with this huge cloud over his head. He is all doom and gloom and so totally not what I or easy child/difficult child need. I just want to smak some sence into him. Whew! Thanks ladies...I needed to get that off my chest. [/QUOTE]
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