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<blockquote data-quote="Steely" data-source="post: 69565" data-attributes="member: 3301"><p>Oh Heather.....you have just described by son, completely, exactly. The weird thing is that I have always blamed myself for his greed and needs.......I assumed that obviously I had created some sort of monster, somehow, someway. Reading your post caused me to realize, that maybe it is not just my faulty parenting, but that some kids minds are just wired this way. Interestingly both your daughter and my son have NonVerbal Learning Disorder (NVLD), which can cause that intense black and white thinking.</p><p></p><p>I do agree with you, that it seems as if they are trying to fill up a hole withing themselves at times. Kind of like a food addict, only it is with stuff - and nothing will ever be enough.</p><p></p><p>My son and I volunteered a bunch of places over the years, and yes it did help, but I am not sure it really stuck with him. Again, that black and white thinking of - that is them - and I am me.</p><p></p><p>Two things that I do think has helped is one, we watch a fair amount of the Natl Geographic channel about different cultures throughout the world. That has really seemed to help with his perspective issues. Not that he walks away going - boy, am I lucky! But it has seemed to broaden his horizons in a deeper sense, and caused him to be bit more introspective about things.</p><p></p><p>The other thing we do is watch, learn, and keep up with all of the political happenings. For whatever reason, he is empowered by being a "democrat" and bashing the republicans - and fortunately this is the type of thing where negative energy is funneled into a forum that is changing the world - rather than the negative energy always being about himself. Does that makes sense? </p><p></p><p>Hang in there.......UGH!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Steely, post: 69565, member: 3301"] Oh Heather.....you have just described by son, completely, exactly. The weird thing is that I have always blamed myself for his greed and needs.......I assumed that obviously I had created some sort of monster, somehow, someway. Reading your post caused me to realize, that maybe it is not just my faulty parenting, but that some kids minds are just wired this way. Interestingly both your daughter and my son have NonVerbal Learning Disorder (NVLD), which can cause that intense black and white thinking. I do agree with you, that it seems as if they are trying to fill up a hole withing themselves at times. Kind of like a food addict, only it is with stuff - and nothing will ever be enough. My son and I volunteered a bunch of places over the years, and yes it did help, but I am not sure it really stuck with him. Again, that black and white thinking of - that is them - and I am me. Two things that I do think has helped is one, we watch a fair amount of the Natl Geographic channel about different cultures throughout the world. That has really seemed to help with his perspective issues. Not that he walks away going - boy, am I lucky! But it has seemed to broaden his horizons in a deeper sense, and caused him to be bit more introspective about things. The other thing we do is watch, learn, and keep up with all of the political happenings. For whatever reason, he is empowered by being a "democrat" and bashing the republicans - and fortunately this is the type of thing where negative energy is funneled into a forum that is changing the world - rather than the negative energy always being about himself. Does that makes sense? Hang in there.......UGH! [/QUOTE]
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