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Nervous About Tomorrow's Meeting...
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 408699" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Having difficult child there might be a good thing. Esp if she gets upset or goes into a rage. It will show that you and husband are not exaggerating or making things up. That was what I faced at IEP and staff meetings and with all but one therapist. It was all focused on how great he was during the meeting and how the problems couldn't be there because he was so "wonderful" and "well mannered" during the meeting. </p><p> </p><p>Times when he wasn't participating were not a big deal, but times when he flew off the handle or insisted that things did happen or he was insistent that I was "lying" (he was always pretty much delusional when he made accusations like this - most of the time in the next breath he was explaining how if we would just get him a ticket to go to Japan and give him a bunch of cash - he though $10,000 would be reasonable - he could go spend a month in japan and find the real life pokemon and bring them home and be a big media hero for proving they do exist but Japan was conspiring to hide them from everyone else in the world. From a 6yo this wasn't a big deal but from a 12 or 13 yo it really was helpful in getting him services, Know what I mean??</p><p> </p><p>Anyway, if this supervisor sees her in a rage or temper I bet you can get more services. Ask them how you are supposed to handle this type of thing at home if she is this out of control in a meeting with preofessionals? It probably wouldn't be too difficult to get her upset just by insisting she bath, put on clean undies, do homework while you wait or whatever she hates to do. </p><p> </p><p>It sounds mean and no one wants to be embarrassed by their child's awful behavior, but in reality it is helping her. How??? Yeah, it sounds off the wall, but these people will NOT treat what they cannot see. So you will be letting them see what she is like and what you need help with - including her denial that she isn't perfect in every way. Think about it. Are people going to rush to help someone walking alone saying'Can you please help me, I believe my arm has been sliced off and I am bleeding out?" or the person who has blood squirting everywhere and is screaming HELP HELP HELP!!!! ?</p><p> </p><p>That is exactly what her behavior needs to do to impress how serious her behaviors are. Bring up the 12yo kid she was sexting with a while back, disappearing after school while sending messages to strangers, her delusions about passing JROTC when she doesn't even try to do any of the activities or wear the uniform, etc.... Go through your past posts if you want reminders - I found that terribly helpful when I needed to list things we had been through with Wiz.</p><p> </p><p>I hope the meeting is productive, that they see how seriously she needs help and that this supervisor is able to do a heck of a lot more than the caseworker can. Otherwise - ask for HER supervisor.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 408699, member: 1233"] Having difficult child there might be a good thing. Esp if she gets upset or goes into a rage. It will show that you and husband are not exaggerating or making things up. That was what I faced at IEP and staff meetings and with all but one therapist. It was all focused on how great he was during the meeting and how the problems couldn't be there because he was so "wonderful" and "well mannered" during the meeting. Times when he wasn't participating were not a big deal, but times when he flew off the handle or insisted that things did happen or he was insistent that I was "lying" (he was always pretty much delusional when he made accusations like this - most of the time in the next breath he was explaining how if we would just get him a ticket to go to Japan and give him a bunch of cash - he though $10,000 would be reasonable - he could go spend a month in japan and find the real life pokemon and bring them home and be a big media hero for proving they do exist but Japan was conspiring to hide them from everyone else in the world. From a 6yo this wasn't a big deal but from a 12 or 13 yo it really was helpful in getting him services, Know what I mean?? Anyway, if this supervisor sees her in a rage or temper I bet you can get more services. Ask them how you are supposed to handle this type of thing at home if she is this out of control in a meeting with preofessionals? It probably wouldn't be too difficult to get her upset just by insisting she bath, put on clean undies, do homework while you wait or whatever she hates to do. It sounds mean and no one wants to be embarrassed by their child's awful behavior, but in reality it is helping her. How??? Yeah, it sounds off the wall, but these people will NOT treat what they cannot see. So you will be letting them see what she is like and what you need help with - including her denial that she isn't perfect in every way. Think about it. Are people going to rush to help someone walking alone saying'Can you please help me, I believe my arm has been sliced off and I am bleeding out?" or the person who has blood squirting everywhere and is screaming HELP HELP HELP!!!! ? That is exactly what her behavior needs to do to impress how serious her behaviors are. Bring up the 12yo kid she was sexting with a while back, disappearing after school while sending messages to strangers, her delusions about passing JROTC when she doesn't even try to do any of the activities or wear the uniform, etc.... Go through your past posts if you want reminders - I found that terribly helpful when I needed to list things we had been through with Wiz. I hope the meeting is productive, that they see how seriously she needs help and that this supervisor is able to do a heck of a lot more than the caseworker can. Otherwise - ask for HER supervisor. [/QUOTE]
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