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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 334947" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>Welcome to the board! You have stumbled upon a great group of people who will provide a whole boatload of support and knowledge.</p><p></p><p>Like everyone else has said, its ok to grieve. There is a great little article somewhere on this site about Holland. Oh here it is!</p><p></p><p> "Welcome to Holland" by Emily Pearl Kingsley about raising kids with disabilities.</p><p></p><p>"When you are going to have a baby, its' like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guidebooks and make your wonderful vacation plans -- The coliseum, Michelangelo's David, the gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting. </p><p></p><p>After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."</p><p></p><p>"Holland?!?!"" you say. "What do you mean, HOLLAND? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."</p><p></p><p>But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay. The important thing is they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place full of pestilence, famine, and disease. It's just a different place. </p><p></p><p>So you must go out and buy new guidebooks. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.</p><p></p><p>It's just a different place. It's slower paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there awhile and you catch your breath, you look around, and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills, Holland has tulips, Holland even has Rembrandts.</p><p></p><p>But everybody you know is busy coming and going from Italy and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say, "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I planned."</p><p></p><p>The pain of that will never, ever go away, because of the loss of that dream is a very significant loss. But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never been free to enjoy the very special, very lovely things about Holland."</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 334947, member: 1514"] Welcome to the board! You have stumbled upon a great group of people who will provide a whole boatload of support and knowledge. Like everyone else has said, its ok to grieve. There is a great little article somewhere on this site about Holland. Oh here it is! "Welcome to Holland" by Emily Pearl Kingsley about raising kids with disabilities. "When you are going to have a baby, its' like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guidebooks and make your wonderful vacation plans -- The coliseum, Michelangelo's David, the gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting. After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland." "Holland?!?!"" you say. "What do you mean, HOLLAND? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy." But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay. The important thing is they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place full of pestilence, famine, and disease. It's just a different place. So you must go out and buy new guidebooks. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met. It's just a different place. It's slower paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there awhile and you catch your breath, you look around, and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills, Holland has tulips, Holland even has Rembrandts. But everybody you know is busy coming and going from Italy and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say, "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I planned." The pain of that will never, ever go away, because of the loss of that dream is a very significant loss. But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never been free to enjoy the very special, very lovely things about Holland." [/QUOTE]
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